Page 58 of Wicked Love

The walls feel like they’re closing in.

Henley straightens. “Do you want us to bring Becca home in a while?”

“Yes, please. Anytime. I just…I need a minute to get it together. Tell the guys to move the party to my house. Bring the swimsuits…I’ll be better once I’m home.”

Henley leans in close. “You don’t have to be better, you know. Your dad just died. It’s okay to handle it however you need to.”

“I can’t be here,” I say. “I need to go home.”

“Do it. The guys and I will stay for a while and no one will even miss you if we get Rhodes and Penn entertaining them,” he teases, and I’m grateful for it.

I find Becca and let her know that Henley will bring her home and make my escape. I’ll text my cousin later and invite her over.

The tension in me eases just driving away. For years, I’ve worked so hard to get my dad’s voice out of my head. It’s like he sits on my shoulder, telling me how worthless I am. The way Adriane left didn’t help. I thought she was in love with me and it turned out I was dispensable. As soon as life got hard, she was out.

There are only a few times when my head is completely clear…when I play football or when I’m with the guys. If I feel like I’m failing Becca in any way, I spiral.

When I pull into my driveway, I take the first deep breath that actually fills my lungs and it’s even better when I step inside my house. Martha runs to greet me and looks around for Becca. When she sees it’s just me, she rubs against my legs before curling up next to my feet. I lean my head against the wall and close my eyes.

Your dad can’t hurt you anymore. Not with his hands or his words or his choices. His damage might be lasting, but you don’t have to carry the weight of it anymore.

For the first time in years, I cry.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

SHOCKER

POPPY

I pull into the driveway, heart hammering harder than I’d like. I hadn’t planned on coming tonight since Bowie didn’t invite me himself, but the girls insisted that I come. I want to be here—I need to see for myself how Bowie and Becca are doing—but it’ll be so embarrassing if he doesn’t want me here.

Sadie opens the door when I knock and envelopsme in a hug.

“I was hoping that was you,” she says. “Everyone’s back here.”

She leads me to the solarium and I immediately find Bowie. He’s standing by the pool, listening intently to the beautiful woman beside him. She’s tall and elegant, her dark hair cascading over her shoulders and her perfect body encased in a red bikini. My chest tightens and I’m tempted to back out of here right now, but I’m trying to be a good friend, whether Bowie wants my friendship or not. Lately I’ve thought we might actually be forming a tentative friendship, but…now all the insecurities are flooding back.

I straighten my shoulders. Bowie is free to be with whoever he wants, and if that gorgeous woman is the one who can make him smile, today of all days, I have no right to be jealous about it. But it stings.

“Poppy!” Becca yells from the pool. “Come swim!”

“Hi!” I wave back and nod. “I will.”

Sadie looks over at me and her eyes widen when she sees my face. “You okay?”

“Fine,” I say, shaking my head and laughing slightly. “Just feeling a little weird being here…”

“Bowie wanted you to come,” Sadie whispers.

“He did? Are you sure?”

“Positive! He told me and Tru to make sure you were invited.” She follows my gaze. “Oh, have you met Amelie yet? She’s Bowie’s cousin from Austria. Isn’t she gorgeous?”

“His cousin.” I laugh as relief courses through me.Get it together,I tell myself. “No, I haven’t met her yet, but yes, I was just thinking about how gorgeous she is.”

Sadie gives me a knowing look and loops her arm through mine. “Let’s go change.” Under her breath she adds, “You’re gorgeous too, by the way.”

I roll my eyes. “Am I that obvious?”

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