Page 64 of Wicked Love

but I feel helpless.

I think I’m going to start trying to figure out

how to get custody of him myself.

Is that crazy?

I’m a single guy who doesn’t have much consistency,

but I want to.

I have you guys to look up to and show me the way,

but you’re not the ones

the court system will be evaluating.

I don’t know…it’s probably a horrible idea.

~Penn

I set the book down and open our text thread.

I just read the last few entries in the playbook. I love you guys. I don’t know what I would do…on a regular basis, not just right now…without you. But thank you for today. Thank you for all the days. And Penn…what you said about getting custody of Sam—you should do it. You love that kid and he loves you, and I have complete faith in you. All the shit we give you aside, you’re a good man and you’ll be an even better dad.

Rhodes

Holy fuck, crying.

Weston

^ Same.

Henley

That is perfectly said, Bow. And he’s right, Penn. You’ve got this and we will support you every step of the way.

Penn

For once in my life, I’m speechless. Thank you, Bowie. Thanks, guys.

And before I can talk myself out of it, I text Poppy.

You’re alive over there, right?

I see the dots and breathe easier. They disappear and then pop up again.

Poppy

Hey, sorry. Yes, I’m alive over here. Thanks.

Something is unsettling about her response. She doesn’t sound like Poppy…which is dumb because it’s not like we’ve texted a ton to begin with, but when we do, it’s more animated, like she is.

I round the corner to the kitchen and see my mom pouring another cup of hot tea. She points at me.

“It’s past your bedtime.” When I don’t say anything, she laughs. “I’m kidding. Lighten up, Maus,” she says.

My lips lift at the nickname. “You haven’t called me mouse in a while.”

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