Page 31 of Demon Daddy's Nanny

Eva's fingers drift to her mouth, touching where mine had been moments before. Her eyes lock onto mine, searching, questioning. The golden glow from the courtyard lamps catches in them, turning them molten.

Words stick in my throat. Explanations, excuses, apologies - none of them form. The weight of my position, my past, my promises crash down. I'm her employer. Annalise's father. A widower who never completed a soul bond. Who has no right to-

"Ridwan?" Her voice breaks through my spiraling thoughts. Soft. Uncertain.

I take another step back, wings mantling around me in an instinctive shield. But I can still see her through the gaps between my feathers - the slight tremble in her hands, the way she leans forward as if drawn by an invisible thread.

The silence stretches between us, filled only by our ragged breathing and the distant sounds of the city beyond the compound walls. I should say something. Anything. But my tongue feels leaden, my thoughts scattered like leaves in a storm.

She deserves words. Deserves an explanation for why I grabbed her, why I kissed her like a starving man at a feast. Why I failed to keep my restraint in place tonight when I’m usually so good - why I’ve been craving her and wasweakfor just a moment. Just enough to ruin everything.

But all I can focus on is the way her pulse jumps at her throat, how her scent mingles with the night air, making my head spin.

"This was a mistake." The words scrape past my lips, tasting of ash and regret. My wings curl tighter, the feathers rustling with tension. "It can't-"

I can't even finish the sentence. Can't look at her face, knowing what I'll see there. The hurt. The confusion. The same longing that's burning through my veins like molten gold.

My boots scrape against the stone as I turn. Each step feels like I'm dragging lead weights, fighting against the pull to go back, to explain, to- No. The compound walls loom higher, their shadows stretching across the courtyard like grasping fingers. Somewhere above, a guard shifts position. The soft clink of armor reminds me of my position, my responsibilities.

"Ridwan, wait-"

Her voice cuts through me like a blade, but I keep walking. My wings ache to spread, to launch me into the sky, but I won't give in to that coward's urge. Instead, I force myself to maintain a measured pace, each footfall echoing off the stone walls. Commander. Leader. Father. The titles ring hollow in my mind,mocking me with everything I should be, everything I'm failing to be in this moment.

The memory of her lips haunts me, a ghost of warmth I have no right to chase. Not after Sera. Not with someone in my employ. Not when I'm responsible for- The list of reasons stretches endless, each one a chain weighing me down.

I reach the archway leading back into the main building. Golden light spills from the enchanted lamps, harsh after the gentle moonlight. Behind me, Eva's presence burns like a brand between my shoulder blades, but I don't turn back. Can't turn back.

My fingers brush the scar on my cheek - an old habit, a reminder of past mistakes. This is another one to add to that list. Another failure to lock away behind the walls I've built.

The door closes behind me with a heavy thud, final as a tomb.

The next days blur together in a haze of paperwork and meetings. I bury myself in reports, territory disputes, trade agreements - anything to keep my mind from wandering back to that night in the courtyard. But every document I touch reminds me of her. The ink smudges like the darkness in her eyes. The texture of parchment echoes the softness of her skin.

I avoid the dining room, taking meals in my study. Skip the evening walks where I might cross her path. The few times I glimpse her down a hallway, I turn sharply, my wings tight against my back, ignoring the pull in my chest that begs me to go to her.

But distance doesn't help. The memories follow me into sleep, haunt my waking hours. The way she'd melted against me, how perfectly she'd fit in my arms. The soft gasp she'd made when I'd first claimed her mouth. My hands clench on the arms of my chair, nails leaving fresh marks in the wood.

"Another chair?" Annalise's voice cuts through my thoughts. She stands in my study doorway, arms crossed. "That's the third one this week."

I force my fingers to relax. "Don't you have lessons?"

"Eva's not feeling well today."

Her name hits like a physical blow. My wings twitch, betraying me. Annalise's eyes narrow, too sharp, too knowing.

"Interesting reaction."

"Go to your room."

She just cocks her head. "You can't hide in here forever."

"I'm not hiding." The words come out as a growl. "I'm working."

"Right." She draws out the word. "That's why you're staring at the same page you were looking at an hour ago."

I glance down. The trade report sits unmarked, unread. Damn it.

"You're impossible lately." Annalise continues. "More brooding than usual, which I didn't think was possible. And Eva's just as bad, walking around like-"

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