Page 18 of Kylan

Marek’s sad eyes met mine over Kylan’s head. I sat down next to them and rubbed Kylan’s back. “You’re okay now,” I said softly.

“I feel so foolish,” Kylan said. “I don’t want you to be mad at me.”

“Mad at you?” Marek asked. “Why would we be mad? Did something happen?”

Kylan sniffled. “I’ve been a mess all day. I don’t know why. And I was missing you both so much. Even though it’s not my day to be with you. I’m sorry. But I was upset at home and Fitch said I should call you, and I didn’t want to because I didn’t want to be a bother, and I didn’t expect you to come over. I just needed to hear your voices.”

Oh, this poor boy.

I leaned in, cuddling him but also Marek as well. “You scared me,” I admitted. “I was so worried. I thought someone had hurt you.”

Kylan turned his head so he could see me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you worry.”

“Of course we would worry,” Marek cooed, strokingKylan’s hair, the side of his face. “How could we not worry?”

“I wasn’t sure if I could call,” he said. “I never have before, but it’s not stipulated in our contract that I can’t call, so I thought... I just needed to hear your voices. I’m so sorry.”

“Fitch told you to call us?” I asked as softly as I could.

Ky nodded. “I told him I missed you both so much and I needed your arms around me so bad I could almost feel you. Then it made my missing you so much worse.”

“Oh, baby,” Marek murmured.

“And Fitch said if I couldn’t call you when I needed you this bad, then it wasn’t fair. He said a daddy might not need his boy every day, but a boy needs his daddies all the time, and then he said I should call you because you’d both understand.”

Marek smiled at me over Kylan’s head now as he rocked him a little. “Of course we understand. You can call us anytime you need.”

Kylan sniffled again. “I don’t deserve you. But I’d be so lost without you.”

I gave him a squeeze, kissing the back of his head. “You do deserve us.”

There was something else, something he wasn’t telling us. And the more I thought about it, the more I realised it was maybe because he didn’t know.

“You know what I think?” I began. “Sit up, Kylan, and look at us.”

He did as I asked, sitting between us on the sofa, hishands in his lap, fidgeting nervously. His face was a streaky, puffy mess, and it hurt my heart.

I took his hand. “You’re not in trouble. In fact, I’m pleased you called when you needed us.”

He looked up at me, eyes wide. “You are?”

“Of course. What Fitch said is correct. A boy needs his daddies all the time.”

Ky nodded. “But I’ve never felt like I did today before.”

“And you feel better now?” I asked.

He nodded eagerly. “Much.”

I smiled for him. “Hmm. Kylan, I wonder if you were feeling all out of sorts today because you felt unsafe.”

His eyes met mine, big and wide. “Unsafe?”

I gave him a nod. “Did something happen today? Something that made you need reassurance?”

His eyes welled with tears, and as soon as one spilled over, he scrubbed it away.

“I did my first solo video today,” he said, voice timid. “Fitch and Benji did theirs and had no problem, but I...” he shuddered as if his skin didn’t fit properly. “I wasn’t feeling it, and then I tried to imagine I was with you.”

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