Page 62 of The Bargain

I’d believed him…

Pounding footsteps echoed up the staircase and filled my silent apartment. I knew before the hammering on my door started that it was Sebastian. For a moment, I considered not answering, just letting him think I wasn’t there. Or that I was ignoring him. Whatever. I didn’t care what he thought anymore.

“Byron! Please, open the door! We need to talk!” Sebastian shouted.

I cringed, tucking my head farther beneath the covers despite the stifling heat. It was too hot to be hiding under the covers, but the world was too harsh and bright to be anywhere but hidden away.

“Please, Byron! Answer the door!”

I sighed. Sebastian was annoyingly stubborn. He was going to keep this up until I finally caved. Or worse, until he broke down the door. That was the last thing I needed right now.

With a huff, I tossed aside the covers, climbed to my feet, and shuffled across the room to open the door for him.

Sebastian burst in, wrapping me up in a tight embrace, but I couldn’t bring myself to return it. I stood there, my body limp and numb.

“Oh, God! Byron, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. This happened so fast. I wasn’t able to step in quickly enough. But don’t give up. I can talk to the board on your behalf, get them to see reason. To understand that none of this was your fault.”

“Don’t.”

Sebastian flinched at that single word. He slowly released me and took a step back, allowing me to walk away from him.

“But…”

“No one is going to believe that it wasn’t my fault. I started dating you of my own free will. I knew the rules and the consequences, yet I still did it anyway,” I continued. My voice was dead. Completely without inflection, as if I couldn’t summon up the emotions that had churned in me just a couple of hours ago.

Even though it had happened only this morning, I didn’t want to talk about any of it now.

“What happened to you?” I asked. My head was throbbing, and my throat was raw from holding in screams and tears.

Sebastian’s ragged voice had somehow become sandpaper to my ears. “I had to issue an apology to the entire company for my behavior and I’m on a temporary leave of absence.”

I grunted. It was more than I’d expected. I’d figured they’d brush all this under the rug or shift the entire blame onto my shoulders. The fact that Sebastian had admitted to some culpability and he’d had to step back, even temporarily, was considerable.

Of course, it was a slap on the wrist compared to my current unemployed status, but that was what you got when your name was on the building.

“Look, it you need some help until you get on your feet…”

My head spun around to him so fast. “Are you offering me money?” I demanded. The little threads that were holding my temper in were snapping faster and faster now. The dam was crumbling, and the town below was about to get washed the fuck out. “That’s what got me into this mess in the first place. I sold out my reputation and my integrity so I could have somebreathing space. So I could have a taste of what a normal life and a normal date with a hot guy might be like.”

“Byron, I can fix this.”

“There’s no fixing this anymore!” I bellowed, but I barely heard the words over the loud cracking sound that broke from within me. “You said I wouldn’t lose my job, and I did. I trusted you.Believedin you.” Shaking my head, I paced away from him. Anger boiled inside of me, but I couldn’t tell any longer if I was pissed at him or myself. “I’m lucky that they paid out my unused vacation time and gave me a somewhat decent severance package because some of the other executives felt bad and tried to go to bat for me. Right now, my choices are living in my car or trying to move in with my mom if I don’t find a job right away.”

“What? You can’t do that! Your mother is toxic. Just being in her presence, listening to her hate, will make you sick.”

“But what other option do I have? I’m not making enough money to afford this apartment, plus her mortgage, plus my brother’s bills.”

“You can come live with me. Besides, our bargain covers?—”

“Don’t bring up that stupid bargain!” I rounded at him, shoving a trembling finger in his face for a second, only to whip my hand away. I resumed my pacing while muttering, “I should never have agreed to this.”

“Should never have…” Sebastian whispered harshly before taking a heavy step toward me. “What about us? I thought we had something. I thought we were building something important to both of us. That it was more than money, but that’s all I’m hearing out of your mouth since I walked in the door.”

“Yeah, because my whole life hinges on having enough of it to pay my bills. Sure, you might not have been born into a rich family, but it’s been long enough that you don’t remember what it’s like to be really poor. You don’t know that constant worry about whether you’re going to scrape together the rent in timeor if you’re going to be evicted at the end of the month. You don’t know what it’s like wondering if you’re going to spend the next month living on nothing but rice and cheap ramen packets, because that’s all you can afford.”

“I don’t want you worrying about that, either. If you’ll move in with me, I’ll take care of you.”

My jaw ached as I clenched my teeth. I knew he was trying to be kind and thoughtful, but his words made the bile rise in the back of my throat. My feet carried me to the far side of the room because they didn’t trust me not to fall into his waiting arms. Let him take all my worries away with more sweet promises, and the terrified part of me wanted to take him up on it. But I couldn’t. I just couldn’t.

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