Page 89 of I Summon the Sea

“Dreams and memories can’t hurt you,” he whispers as if he’s heard my thought, but he’s wrong. They hurt worse than physical wounds, they hurt all the time, in places where nothing can reach to soothe the ache.

“You’re okay.” Muscular arms wrap around me, pressing my face to his hard chest, and his scent burrows under my skin. “Take a breath for me, Rae. Just breathe.”

Though I fight his hold, ensconced in the warm, dark circle of his arms, I feel the pressure on my chest easing, and I draw shuddering breaths, one after another.

“Let me in,” he murmurs. “I know you don’t trust me, but let me help you tonight.”

I don’t try to ask why. I don’t want to examine my weakness too closely.

His hands slide under my back and knees, and he lifts me up, curled against his chest. His steps lead us deeper inside my room, whispering on the plush carpet. He’s not wearing shoes, Ithink, the thought faint like a flame in a storm, trembling inside my mind. Was he in bed? How did he know to come find me? Where was he supposed to be, as Tru had started to say?

“Shush,” he whispers as if I’ve voiced my thoughts, walking us to my bed. “Empty your mind. Let go of your fears.”

Impossible, and yet secure in his arms, I feel my thoughts fleeing. It should scare me. This relinquishing of power and loss of control should anger me, but it feels… freeing.

It feels safe, though it cannot be.

He climbs onto my bed with me still held against his chest, impressive muscles shifting in his arms, pecs, and stomach when he lies down, laying me along his side. One of his arms is under my head, and with his other hand he pulls one of my legs between his. He gathers me close, so close not a single sheath of paper could fit between us.

I’m smothered in his scent, his presence, his strength—yet I breathe easily now, the memories sliding back into the box buried deep in my mind.

Reality is consuming me, taking up my attention. The way his bare skin feels against my neck, the way his thighs shift with thick-hewn muscle, the shudder of his breathing the only thing betraying his agitation. Under the smoke and leather, there’s a whiff of tea and aromatic resin that tightens my belly even more.

How can my body go from panic to desire? How can I want him to touch me, slide his rough hands all over me, cup my curves and explore the ache between my legs when I’m not even sure I should be near him in the first place?

I want him. I want him with an ache so fierce it lights up my blood.

I lift my hand to his face to touch his mouth—soft—then his cheek—rough—and slide it up to that chiseled cheekbone marked with black whorls.

“Rae…” He catches my hand before I reach my goal and lowers it to his chest, between us.

Through the sheer black shirt, I make out black lines on his pecs. Smoothing my hands over them, I think I can almost feel them, feel their outline under my fingertips. Marks? Or scars?

“Don’t ask,” he whispers, a raw quality to his voice, roughening it. “Don’t think. Rest. You need to keep your strength to make it through this alive.”

I want to ask whathewants, but I don’t want to contradict him. I wouldn’t, even if I could. I lift my head to meet his gaze, so dark and troubled, so velvety and arresting. I think I catch silver and gray shards in it. They swim like precious fish in twin ponds of night.

“Sleep.” He sighs, pressing his lips to my brow. An imprint of fire. Then he tucks my head under his chin, my cheek against his chest. “Sleep now.” It’s like a spell, a magical command dragging me under. “I’ll be right here.”

That promise tugs at the back of my mind, unknotting the fear and tension, turning the key in the box of nightmares and memories, locking it as I drift away.

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

“Good morning!” The cheery female voice stabs into my aching head, followed by the screech of drapes being pulled aside, and then light joins in the assault, spearing through my crusted lashes. “I hope your ladyship had a good night’s sleep. It’s getting late and breakfast will soon be served in the gardens.”

Oh, no…I groan silently, throwing an arm over my face and pulling the covers over my head. Already morning? Nightmares and sleep deprivation are fun—butwait. I slept. I must have, as I don’t recall most of the night.

But what happened? Why do I feel like someone punched me in my head last night? Was I drinking? Was it…?

Someone.Lifting my arm off my head, pushing down the covers, I pat the mattress by my side, somehow convinced thatsomeonewas supposed to be there.

Strong arms wrapped around me, hauling me against a thudding heartbeat, the hard cushions of bulging pecs and biceps smothering me… A warm breath ruffling my hair and a scent of smoke and leather filling my senses, making me feel safe, while at the same time putting an ache between my legs, I’m not used to feeling…

Except for when I’m near him.

Jai…

Jai was here, in my room, in my bed, holding me in his arms all night. I recall myself banging on the door and Tru opening it, Jai appearing and taking command as I spiraled out of control, crying and panicking, lost in the past.

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