Page 32 of The Wonder of You

“So, she is walking back alone?” he questions.

“Yes,” I sigh. “She toldmeto walk back alone so she could sort something out. She was rather persistent.”

Dad doesn’t even look at me as he gets up and puts his glass back on the table.

“I’ll go and meet her,” he says, and out the door he goes.

I have a feeling it wouldn’t be the same reaction if it was the other way around. I haven’t got the energy for this, though; the night has exhausted me and I want to think about Phoenix. I want to dream up scenarios of a life together. The idea makes the butterflies flutter in my stomach. I’ve soon forgotten about Lydia and Dad.

I struggle to sleep as I tease myself with thoughts of Phoenix. I’ve never made love with a man, but the thought of it with him makes my stomach tingle in a funny way. I don’t just care about the idea of sex, though. I felt so safe and comforted when I was with him. I long to feel safe. To be loved.

It was like we already knew each other and my mind can’t let that thought go.

I pretend to be asleep as I hear Dad and Lydia finally open the door and walk inside the house.

“What did he say then? Did he say he would? Did he say how much he would give?” Dad frets.

“He didn’t say much really, just that he would consider it.”

“Is this the right choice, Lydia? Really?”

“Absolutely. It will help us a lot and it’s not a loss to us really, is it?” Her voice sounds bitter.

I wonder what they’re talking about. I’d only be told off if I got up and asked.

“It’s not a loss to us, is it?” Lydia repeats. She has so much power and authority in her voice. I am surprised she is speaking to our father. It sounds like she is talking to a toddler.

“I am not sure,” he mutters.

“It’s not, not at all, weneedthis, Dad.” Her voice softens. “Me and you.”

Ouch.

What about me? Whatever they’re talking about down there… how do I come into it?

I try not to dwell on it, though I have no idea what they’re talking about. Perhaps she is trying to convince Dad to move, to find a better a job, anything to bring us more money.

I am sure I have nothing to worry about.

Phoenix is all I can think about now anyway.

Chapter 22

“We’re leaving tonight. It’s all happened much sooner than I thought,” Phoenix tells me. I am so glad I lied to Dad about meeting my friend and came here instead. I would have been gutted if they had left without a goodbye. Was I being too hopeful that Phoenix was serious about showing up to my house if I never turned up to meet him? Luckily, I never had to worry, Dad barely looked up when I told him I was going out.

Panic seizes me. My life has changed in such a short time, and Phoenix means so much to me. Iknowhe is my soulmate. It’s the only possible reason these feelings can be so intense so soon. The circus feels so much like… home. Could this be home?

Phoenix looks like he’s about to say something, but instead, he leans forward and kisses me. I feel robbed of breath. He grabs my face with his hands and his tongue meets mine.

We are one.

Never did I believe I’d let a man do this to me with so much passion, but this… with Phoenix…

Phoenix is different.

I am his. He is mine.

We pull apart, both of us breathless and longing. He touches my cheek softly, his eyes searching mine.