Page 13 of Rejecting his Mate

The inside has a lived-in feel, which is hardly surprising given there are fifteen of us under this one roof. There’s a huge dining table that can seat us all in the large kitchen at the back of the house and two living rooms that anyone can use. Most of the pack enjoys spending time with each other, but I would rather find solace in alone time.

Adeline leads me into my bedroom on the second floor and closes the door behind us. Dalton’s room is down the hallway and is larger, with its own bathroom. He has asked me a hundred times to move in there with him, but Ican’t bring myself to give up the one retreat I have in this place. It is only a matter of time before he forces the issue, but for now, it is not a fight he seems to care about having.

He doesn’t want me in his space, either.

My bedroom is the same one I have had since I first arrived here with Adeline, though the single bed has been swapped for a queen that is pushed against one wall. There are also a few pieces of furniture spread around the room, bumped and broken from years of use.

On my bed, sitting against the pillows is the teddy bear I arrived here with. It is threadbare in places, dirty and falling apart, but I have never been able to part with it. I don’t know why, but it seems important to keep him close.

“What’s wrong?” I ask. I have no idea why she’s acting so secretive, but it puts me on edge.

“Nothing.” The smile she gives me is forced. “I just wanted to talk to you before the first moon ceremony tomorrow night.”

“What about it?” Nervous flutters fill my belly at the mention of it. I’m excited to meet my wolf, but terrified too.

Tomorrow night, Klaus and our beta male, Alaric, will use pack magic to draw my wolf out. It is the same ritual all wolves must go through soon after their twenty-first birthday.

The first shift hurts, or so I’m told.

Every bone in the body is rearranged to allow the shift to happen, and they break and snap until the wolf can come out. I’m anxious about the pain, but Adelineassures me that with time, it becomes easier until it no longer hurts.

“I need… I need to tell you something.”

“Okay.” I wait for her to say more, but she doesn’t speak. Instead, she goes to the window and peers down at the ground. “Adeline?” I say her name, which makes her shoulders tense.

“What do you remember before you came to the pack?”

I frown, my brows coming together. This isn’t something we normally talk about. Adeline never wants to discuss the past, so why this now? “What’s this about?”

She faces me, nibbling on her bottom lip as she pulls her cardigan around her body like armor, but I’m not sure what she’s trying to protect herself from. “Just humor me. What do you remember?”

I think back, trawling through memories I have kept buried in the vaults of my mind for over a decade. There are plenty of snapshots of days spent with my pack mates, my friends, and even Dalton, but there is nothing before the day I arrived. I try to push past that memory, but the only thing I remember is being eight years old and sitting in the passenger seat of Adeline’s car, clutching the teddy that still sits on my bed.

“I don’t remember anything.” I frown at her. “Why are you bringing this up?”

I lost my mom in an accident that caused my memory to fracture, or at least that’s what I was told. We were in the car. My mom lost control and we went into the river. I was trapped underwater for a while before the rescue teams got me out.

I don’t recall the accident or the drowning, but Adeline told me that was why I can’t remember. There was damage to my brain because of the lack of oxygen.

The story of how I came to be with my pack is ingrained in my memories because I have heard it so many times. I don’t remember anything about that day myself.

Adeline says she came to get me from the hospital and brought me to the pack out of love for my father, her brother, who died when I was just a baby. I don’t remember him.

Over the years, I have tried to remember my mama, but it’s like there is a void there, nothing but white noise where memories of her should be.

I hate the accident for stripping away those precious moments we must have had together during my first eight years. We were together at the end, but she died, and I survived. I always hated myself for not going with her.

Adeline tears her fingers through her hair, and I notice the tremble. “I just… wondered if maybe the mating bond had helped knock something loose.”

I reach out, grasping her hand in mine before she can run it through her hair again. “I’m grateful for all you’ve done for me,” I tell her, meaning every word.

Without Adeline to take me in, I would have been packless, alone. Lone wolves suffer, some even driven to taking their own lives. Pack is everything, and without it, we are nothing.

“I’ve never doubted that,” Adeline murmurs. “Theceremony tomorrow night… how… how are you feeling about it?”

“A little nervous,” I admit.

Adeline stares at me as if she wants to say more. After a moment, she breaks eye contact, her gaze going to the window. “I’ve always loved you like you were my own,” she says.

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