Page 47 of Crash & Burn

I grabbed her shoulders as if I was making sure she wasactuallythere because seeing her walking towards me honestly felt like it could only happen in my imagination.

I felt the heat of her skin through the cotton of my t-shirt she was wearing, and it was like I was set on fire.

But not in the way I’m used to.

I’m used to a constant, dull burn from burying parts of my life I never had time to deal with.

By the time I got my mom and my sisters out of that house and made sure my father would never be able to get to them again, it was too late. The anger, frustration, and sadness was buried so deep, it was easier to keep it there.

But with Mia, it was like something inside of me came to life. A part of me that lost its light was brought to life again, so I couldn’t help it.

Pulling her in felt like the most natural thing to do, and she felt sorightin my arms.

More right than anything has felt in years.

And her lips.

Fuck.

I have thought of those lips for weeks, convincing myself that I’ll only ever be able to look, not touch.

Yet here I am, selfishly giving in to my desires to be close to her because she makes me feel like I am capable of being whole again.

And that’s fucking scary.

She looked at me with those pretty brown eyes, and I was ready to fall to my knees.

“What the fuck was that about?” Mateo barks, taking a few steps towards me. He is careful not to raise his voice too loud, keeping his usual-cool demeanor in case someone was to overhear us in the gated lot.

I can tell he is not very happy with me.

“What was what?” I ask, playing dumb and trying to keep my defensiveness in check.

I had a bad feeling when we got to the merch booth after we finished our set, slightly coming down from the high of how amazing the show went, and Mia wasn’t there. I had my eye on her the entire show, watching as she weaved through the crowd with her camera in her hands. I was still able to focus on the show, proving that I am somewhat getting ahold of the distraction she is to me, and we fucking killed it.

The first show of this six-show series couldn’t have gone any better, until it all went to shit because I took my eye off of her for one second and some dickhead who couldn’t keep his hands to himself got a hold of her.

“You knowexactlywhat I’m talking about,” Mateo says. “Since when are you so protective of Mia?” I was already on edge when it came to Mia because of how our last conversation ended, but then seeing the look on her face when that guy wouldn’t let go of her, I couldn’t keep my anger down. I honestly thought I was going to murder the guy.

“It is no different than you.” Mateo and I both have younger sisters and grew up basically raising them, so I have no idea why he would be pissed about how I handled the situation. Mateo has never been one to let his temper get the best of him, but I don’t mind being the one to throw the punch. “Or Theo. Or Silas. You three were pissed too seeing how that guy was all over her when she didn’t want anything to do with him.”

“It is completely different. None of us threw a fucking punch, Eddie!” Mateo’s cool is dissolving fast. “I haven’t seen you get mad like that in years, and I can’t help but think it has something to do with your feelings towards my sister.”

I open my mouth and immediately close it.

My feelings towardshissister.

That same sister he almost caught me kissing two minutes ago.

What the hell am I doing?

“It wasn’t like that.” Even though that isexactlyhow it was.

I can’t be having these feelings about Mia, and tonight proved that I am headed in thewrongdirection with her. The direction that leads to me arguing with my best friend.

The kiss was a mistake.

I should have never given in to those feelings.