Page 114 of Crash & Burn

There is no feeling like being up on stage. The electrifying energy of the crowd washes over you, and the rush is unexplainable. Each beat of my drum forms this connection with the music and it surrounds me. Time feels like it stops and nothing else matters.

When we end the song, the applause from the people there supporting us brings me back to earth before it starts all over again when I hit my drumsticks three times. Theo’s guitar riffs surge through the air, and Silas’sbass grounds us. Mateo’s vocals hit hard, lyrics meaning something different to each of us.

I wasn’t able to see Mia in the crowd, assuming that she stayed towards the back. I’m anxious when I can’t see her, but I know Luke and Emmett will keep an eye on her.

The show ends, Mateo thanks the crowd like he always does, and we all take a bow. The screams and cheers never get old, and my smile always feels bigger on stage.

“We killed it!” Theo exclaims as we get backstage. He slaps his hands down on Silas’s shoulders.

“We really did,” I laugh as I twirl one of my drumsticks between my fingers. I’m itching to go find Mia in the crowd, but I don’t want to seem too eager.

Theo and Silas have been on my case about Mia since day one. Lucky for me, they collectively have the attention span of a gnat, so they lost interest in if Mia and I were a thing.

“You coming tonight?” I ask Mateo as we head to the merch booth. We always like to spend some time at the booth, selling T-shirts and hoodies to our fans. It is fun to meet the people who make it possible for us to do what we love.

“Where?” he asks.

“To Cityscape?” Annie, Drew, and Mia wanted to try out a new rooftop bar near the part of downtown Milwaukee we’re in, but I figured Mia would have let Mateo know.

“Oh yeah, Mia mentioned you all were going out later. No, I’m good.”

I feel a rush of excitement surge through me, and it is almost immediately replaced with guilt.

“You sure?” I ask him as we walk over to the booth. The volume around us rises with the increase of people in the crowd versus backstage.

“Yeah,” he says over the noise. “I have plans.”

I stop in my tracks.

“Wait, you’re saying you have friends other thanus?” I ask, gesturing to me and Theo and Silas who are already flirting away with some girls buying Cross My Heart T-shirts.

Mateo laughs. “If by ‘us’ you mean these two yahoos and the Lenny’s crew? Yes, in fact, I do.”

The Lenny’s crew.

I like it.

“I’ve been spending time with a few people I work with.” Since Mateo works from home during the week, it makes sense he has to make plans to see them since they don’t have an office to go into. “I’m actually going to head out now. Can you tell Mia bye for me?”

“Yeah, no problem.”

“Thanks, man. You’re the best. See you later.” He gives me a wave before he leaves, and I walk over to the booth, the guilt in my stomach not residing.

“Where’s he going?” Silas asks when I start checking out the few people in line next to where he and Theo are supposed to be selling t-shirts rather than making plans to meet up with this group of girls.

“He had other plans,” I explain.

“You get Mia all to yourself then, huh?”

I turn to look at him as the crowd around our booth slowly fades as another band begins to play.

“Excuse me?” I say.

Silas laughs, “Do you guys really think you’re hiding anything? You can tell you two are fucking from a mile away.”

“Hey,” I say, a little louder than I meant to, getting Theo’s attention as he says bye to the group of girls. I take a step towards Silas, and I see Theo’s face harden. “Don’teverlet me hear the words ‘Mia’ and ‘fucking’ come out of your mouth in the same sentence again. Got it?”

Theo and Silas both know my track record when it comes to losing my cool, both having been there when I lost it on my dad over a decade ago, and a few other times over the years.

---