Page 96 of Crash & Burn

He doesn’t take his eyes off me, his green eyes burning into me, seeing parts of me only he can understand.

I lightly move one of my hands across his cheek, feeling him lean into my touch. His eyes briefly close, and we stay like this for a moment.

My finger, almost instinctively, finds the tip of his scar, starting just below his hairline, the skin lightened and slightly raised. When I move my finger down the scar, his grip on my thighs tightens, and his brows knit together, and I freeze. My hand threatens to pull away, but, just before I do, his eyes open and find mine, watching me.

Allowing me permission to see him, all of him.

And I take full advantage.

I slowly move my finger down, tracing the raised skin. My finger grazes over his eyebrow and just above his eye. His eyes close for a second as I trace over his eyelid and down his cheek, opening them and finding mine again. I’m flooded with emotion, reflecting what I see in Eddie’s eyes. There is hurt, anger, frustration, and sadness, and I feel it all.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper, my voice shaking with emotion. I apologize even though it isn’t my fault.

“No,” he whispers back, shaking his head slowly. His forehead falls to mine. “Don’t do that.”

“I wish I could take it all away.” I close my eyes. Someone like Eddie doesn’t deserve to carry the weight he does.

“Don’t,” he says again. “You’re not going to feel sorry for me. You’re not going to take on the impossible job of putting me back together. I’m yours, baby, but you gotta take me as I am. There is no fixing someone like me.”

“It isn’t an impossible job,” I answer. I lean back a little, so I can see him more clearly, my hands still holding his face in my palms. “You don’t need fixing because you aren’t broken.”

“Mia, I’m not going to be a burden to you. I refuse to be the person who brings you down. I can’t do that to you.”

“Eddie,” I whisper. This boy has no idea what he is doing to me, and he has no idea how fucking special he is. I want to spend my days showing him how amazing he is, showing him how much the world needs more people like him.

So selfless, so kind, so strong.

We’re all broken, in one way or another, but I want to be the person who holds him together because he deserves to see himself the way we all do.

I bring his face to mine, making sure he can see nothing but the truth in my eyes. “You deserve to be taken care of too.”

His mouth opens as if to say something more, but nothing comes out. Instead, he tightens his grip on my thighs before moving them up to rest on my hips.

“Let me take care of you,” I whisper, and I mean it with everything I have in every way possible. Last time we let ourselves give in to each other, he was calling the shots. And while it was incredibly hot, and the memories are ones I revisit often when I’m feeling rather lonely with no one but my vibrator to turn to, I want my turn to be in control.

His lips are on mine in an instant, one hand finding the side of my neck, the other on my back, both pulling me closer. Eddie’s lips against mine feel right. His kiss says the words he couldn’t find, and I know there is no going back.

The movement of his lips on mine reignites the fire I felt all those months ago in the green room, my stomach flipping at the memories. It confirms that these terrifying feelings I have for him are not going anywhere, and it is more than just my body’s reaction to him.

I am both scared and exhilarated at the thought.

Our kiss deepens, and the first touch of his tongue on mine makes me feel ready to combust. He pulls me in by the hips, the only thing separating us is the fabric of his jeans and my underwear.

And right now, that is way too much.

Crawling onto his lap in a skirt did not have any ulterior motives, and it did a relatively good job covering me when we were talking. Now, that the talking has ceased, I can see that it may not have been my brightest moment.

I don’t have any room to care because I feel the need Eddie has for me, and it is the same need I have for him. Pressure blooms in my lower stomach, and the distance between us, no matter how little it is, is too much.

My fingers run up Eddie’s neck, eliciting a groan from his throat, and I grab handfuls of his dark locks, in an attempt to pull him closer. My hips move on their own accord, attempting to relieve the pressure budding in any way possible, my composure disintegrating with every swipe of his tongue on mine.

“Mia,” Eddie whispers against my lips. “Sunshine, you’re killing me.”

“Good,” I whisper back, feeling his smile against my own. I pull his lips back to mine and rock my hips against him. I’m rewarded with another groan, and I can’t help but love watching him slowly lose control.

For someone who puts on the act that they are all together, so laid back and carefree all the time, having him underneath me, allowing me to be the one in control does something to not only my body but to my heart.

My lips touch his again, and I gently take his bottom lip between my teeth, and he lets out a tiny gasp as his hips start matching my pace. I kiss his lips one more time before feathering kisses down his jaw, making my way to his neck and loving the reactions I’m pulling from him. Wanting all of them, all at once.

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