Page 75 of Life After

“Rube’s favourites.” Lyn smiled as Jen thrust them towards her, admiring the bright petals. “Thank you, Jen. They’re lovely.”

“I wasn’t sure what else to bring. I thought about nipping to the shop for wine, but Angela who works there would probably be on the phone to my mum within seconds.”

Lyn frowned. “I don’t understand.”

“Oh…I’m sober. Have been since I was arrested. When I got out, I decided that drinking hadn’t done me any favours, so I cut it out completely.”

Lyn cocked her head towards the door that led to the living room. “That’s not the worst idea you’ve ever had. I’m glad you recognised your relationship with alcohol wasn’t a good one.”

“Do any of usreallyhave a good relationship with the stuff? It’s poison, yet we’re encouraged to neck it in copious amounts for a good night out.”

“You’re right. When Ruby was alive, you rarely drank.”

That was true. Jen had always chosen to remain as sober as possible so she could take care of Ruby on a night out. It wasn’t that Ruby ended the night legless, not at all, but she was known for being tipsy one drink in. It didn’t matter what she drank; she just couldn’t tolerate her alcohol the way a lot of their friends could. “Had to be on the ball. You know what she was like.”

“You carried her up the stairs many a time.” Lyn lowered Jen’s flowers to the dining table in her open-plan living room, then followed Jen towards the couch. “Thank God for that. I’d have a broken back by now.”

“Yeah, she liked to do the whole ‘dead weight’ thing once she fell out of the cab.” Jen laughed, smiling back at Lyn when she also chuckled. It was nice to be here without the dreadful atmosphere of late. “How have you been, Lyn?”

“Not too bad. Life is quiet; it has been for some time now. But…yeah. You know what she’d say if she saw me moping around.”

“Mm. The same thing she’d say to me.” Jen cast her gaze on Lyn’s plush black carpet. “Still working?”

“Oh, yes. I don’t know what I’d do with myself if I didn’t have work to go to,” Lyn said as she sat back on the couch. “There was a long period where people just stared at me, probably because they didn’t know what to say, but work keeps me going. My friends there keep me sane.”

“It’s always good to have friends around you.”

Lyn gazed back at Jen, an unusual look in her eyes. “Did you have that? Friends and people to support you?”

“They…tried. Everyone around me tried to do the best they could for me.” Jen could never repay her friends and family for those months after Ruby’s death. She also couldn’t apologise enough for pushing them all away. “If I’d taken the help and support everyone was offering, we wouldn’t only just be catching up after thirteen months of me in prison.”

Lyn shook her head and closed her eyes. “I hate thinking about you in prison.”

“It was the best place for me. Trust me.”

“Still, you should have been here with all of us. Where we could look after one another. It’s what Ruby would have wanted.”

Jen hadn’t known what to do with herself once she’d hit the bottom. It hadn’t taken her long to tumble her way down there, but getting back out seemed too much like hard work. It had been easier to wallow alone, to drink herself into oblivion, to medicate with whatever drugs she could get her hands on. Her only saving grace was that she’d avoided the harder stuff. “I couldn’t look you in the eye. I know that makes me a coward, but I couldn’t bring myself to even knock on your door. On those days when I’d wake up and want help, I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t ask.”

“You know I would have done anything I could for you, Jen. It was always you and Ruby. We didn’t see one without the other.”

“I know. But you were grieving. We all were. I just didn’t handle it the way other people did. I chose to ruin everything because, in my mind, I’d lost the one thing that mattered to me, and that was Ruby. Without her, I didn’t see the point. I couldn’t focus on anything at all, I couldn’t sleep, I just…couldn’t function without her.” Jen sniffled as tears welled in her eyes. “I didn’twantto function without her.”

“Believe me, I didn’t either.” Lyn took Jen’s hands and held them tight. “Do you promise me you’ll never go back to that place again?”

Jen didn’t like to make promises, but this was one that she could keep. She also believed it was something Lynneededto hear. “I promise you.”

“And you’ll start coming over to visit me? Maybe have your dinner while you’re here?”

Jen’s heart swelled. Lyn had always been one of those mothers who would feed the entire street if it was required of her. “Of course. I see Suzanne every night, but I can have dinner with you. That’s no problem. She’s really happy I’m here this evening.”

“And you don’t have dinner plans tonight already?”

Jen’s brows drew together. “No. Not that I’m aware of.”

“Good. I made you your favourite.” Lyn winked as she got to her feet. “Come on. Let’s eat.”

Jen followed Lyn. She surely hadn’t made Jen what she hoped it was, had she?