Page 22 of Life After

“Why?”

“I don’t know.” Jen lifted a shoulder. “It’s just not something I’m used to. Compliments, you know?”

“I understand.” Suzanne regarded Jen with a smile as they reached a red light. “Before I met John, it wasn’t often I came across it either.”

Jen turned in her seat a little, wanting to know everything she possibly could about Suzanne. While it was possible, she wanted to remain intrigued by Suzanne Dixon. It was hard not to be, given how they’d met. “How did you meet him?”

“Honestly?” Suzanne lifted a brow, then laughed. “At the fresh meat counter at a local supermarket. Only once we went on a date did I realise he knew my brother, Jeff. They’d worked together on a few projects over the years.”

Jen smiled. “Sometimes those are the life-changing moments, and we don’t realise it until many years later.”

“I was picking up a piece of fillet steak. John was the next in line. He made a joke about how he wished someone would show him how to cook a good steak correctly.” Jen caught Suzanne’s faraway look, but she understood. It also wasn’t an issue for Jen when Suzanne reminisced. He’d been her husband; of course she was entitled to these moments. “I tried to explain it to him, and he came right out with it and asked if I’d cook with him.”

“That’s kinda sweet, actually.”

“I thought so, too.” Suzanne’s shoulders relaxed as she continued their drive towards the coast. “I wasn’t even looking when I met John. I’d only been out of my previous relationship for a few months, so meeting someone was the last thing on my mind.”

“That says a lot about John if he caught you at a moment in your life when you weren’t thinking about a relationship.”

“You’re right.”

Jen gazed out of the window, sighing inwardly. “I think the same kind of thing happened with us. And I know there isn’t really an ‘us’ yet—I don’t think—but I certainly wasn’t looking when you asked me out for that drink.” Jen reached a hand over the console and squeezed Suzanne’s thigh.

Suzanne looked at Jen briefly. “I always wonder if I’d been too forward that day. Sometimes I still can’t believe I asked you.”

“I’m glad you did. I wouldn’t have had the balls to ask you out for a drink.”

“Oh, I don’t know. You don’t strike me as the quiet or shy type, Jen.”

Jen wasn’t. At least, she never used to be. But from the moment she had come home, Jen had decided she would keep her head down and focus on just living. She didn’t want any attention on her because it inevitably turned into bad attention at some point. Just existing in this world had been Jen’s focus. “I never used to be, but with everything that’s happened over the last few years, I just want to live a content life. That may sound boring, and I really hope it doesn’t turn you off me, but it’s true.”

“It doesn’t turn me off you at all. I think calm and content is where I’m also headed. We only have one life, Jen. How you choose to live it is entirely your own decision.” Suzanne cleared her throat. “That’s not to say Ineverwant to have fun anymore, but I don’t know…losing John just made me realise that life is incredibly special, and nobody has the right to dictate how anyone lives theirs. If a quiet, gentle existence is what you want, then that’s okay. Everyone is so used to acting on impulse or forcing themselves through a situation they’d rather not be in. If you can learn to say no, as I have when something doesn’t suit me, then your life will be far better for it.”

Jen couldn’t agree more. “I’m guessing there was a lot of excitement in your marriage, and now you want to slow down?”

“John was always making plans and telling me about them at the last minute. If that was dinner, then okay, but when he chose to come home from work and tell me we were flying out of the country the following morning…it wasn’t ideal.”

“I feel like we’re kinda on the same path,” Jen said as she looked out of the window again. “I’m not sure what mine is right now, but our wavelength is definitely similar. At least, that’s how it feels to me.”

Suzanne took Jen’s hand. “I feel the same way. I’m not looking for some huge adventure, but I am looking for someone who makes me feel as though there is a second chance at love.”

Could Jen be that for Suzanne? God, she hoped so. “There’s always a second chance. Not only at love but most things in life.” Jen was speaking purely from experience when she said that. Perhaps her love life would never come to be anything meaningful ever again, but she’d already been given a second chance to make her life something more than it had been since Ruby died. Jen would love to imagine a world where she and Suzanne took this further, but she had to prepare herself for the likelihood of that happening. Those odds wereverylow, and to consider anything else would be a mistake. “We’ve only known one another for a few weeks, but I think you’re great. You’re…I don’t know. Probably one of the most positive people I’ve met in a long time,” Jen said. “And gorgeous. Ridiculously gorgeous.”

Suzanne pulled up in a parking space close to the beach and turned in her seat. “Please believe me when I tell you that I’mveryhappy I met you.”

Jen could only smile and appreciate Suzanne’s honesty. “Me too.”

“Now, let’s go for that beach walk. There’s a lovely little restaurant at the end of the prom. I’d like to take you for lunch.”

“I’ll…take you for lunch. You drove here.” If these were the moments Jen could have with Suzanne when she wasn’t working, then Jen was going to do everything she could to enjoy their time together. “Come on. Let’s get some fresh air.”

With her handsecurely in Jen’s, Suzanne stared out at the water, strolling so peacefully along the sand. Jen had stopped at a nearby refreshment van along the prom and picked up coffee for them, the restaurant Suzanne had spoken about almost visible in the distance. This stretch of beach was the quieter area along the coast, but there could have been hundreds of people milling around them, and Suzanne likely wouldn’t have noticed. She often found herself in her own head when she was alone with Jen.

Thankfully, for the first time in several years, being in her head wasn’t so daunting. In the months leading on from John’s death, Suzanne had spent so long wondering where her life was going, but now that Jen was planting herself firmly in it, Suzanne was just taking each day as it came. She didn’t worry about what may or may not happen; Jen was very good at putting her at ease.

“I haven’t been to the beach since Ruby died,” Jen spoke quietly, her hand tightening around Suzanne’s. “We spent a lot of time here together growing up, and then when one of us was having a crisis as we sailed into our twenties, we would always find ourselves here.”

Ah. Suzanne probably should have checked with Jen that she was happy to come to the beach today. She hadn’t realised it could be a moment she didn’t want to relive. “I’m sorry. I should have asked.”

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