Page 101 of Even Beneath the Stars

Should be a total disaster.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Xavier

I’m not that drunk.

That’s what I tell myself as I step into the Welsford, blinking against thetoo-brightlights. My brain is workingfine. I’mwalking straight. I’ve got this.

It takes me longer than it should to find the dining room. I barely register the words the hostess says to me. Something aboutmy table waiting. Then she gestures to a server; some guy who looksstupidly professional, and suddenly he’s guiding me through the dining room, hand against my back like I’m some frail, unsteady senior.

I don’t need an escort, but whatever.

The place is packed. Too many eyes, too many whispers. The Rockwell name carries weight here, and I can feel people watching. Judging.

Fuck ’em.

Theempty seat beside Finnis the first thing I notice. He’s been waiting for me.Saved me a spot.His legs are swinging beneath the chair, and when his eyes land on me, they light up.

He’s the only reason I bothered showing up at all.

Downing Seb’s dad’s top-shelf whiskeywas amistake. Animpulsive, reckless, fucking stupid mistake. The kind of thing I don’t do. But my mother showing up—right when things were finallygood—it cut deep. Felt like the last straw. And when I bailed after she preened around in her barely-there bikini in front of my friends in a way I might find humorous ifshe wasn’t my fucking mother—it felt like sheknewI washappy and couldn’t let that stand. Just had toremind me that no matter how much I pretend or get lost in the idea of being normal, I’m still part of thisbroken, fucked-up family. And there’s nothing I can do to stop that. Or to keep Finn from drowning in that same reality, no matter how hard I try.

I know that’s not the way it happened—that my mother has no clue the way things were starting to change for Finny and me these past few weeks. But that’s how it felt when I stormed out of the house, blood boiling, muscles tense, and so angry I barely said a word the entire drive to Seb’s house.

The drinking seemed like a good way to drown that out.

And it might’ve worked. But then Seb cut me off,"You can’t show up like this, bro. Just crash here, sleep it off."

Which made me look at the time on my phone, and realize I wasalready supposed to be at the Welsford. And bailing on this meal would just prove my parents right—that I’mthe disappointment they expect me to be. More importantly, it would meanleaving Finn alone with them.

I couldn’t do that. So I will fake my way through this. For him.

“Xave’s here!” Finny beams up at me, and I grin back, reaching out to squeeze his sidewhere I know he’s most ticklish. Hesquirms, smiling wider.

Then my gaze lands on Maggie.

She looks horrified.

A second later, her face changes—not horrified anymore. Just… sad.

Before I can make sense of that, my mother catches my eye. She looksannoyed as hell, nails tapping against her wine glass.

My father hasn’t even looked up from his phone yet.

I drop into the chair, and mysilverware clatters to the floorwith an obnoxious metallic echo. "Shit… sorry," I bend down too fast to grab them. The roomtiltsslightly.

The waiter reaches for them, but I brush him off. "S’fine," I say. Possibly too loudly. "I can still use ’em.Five-second rule, right?"

It takes me a moment to register theabsolute silenceat the table.

Finn’s wide-eyed.

Maggie’s napkin sailboat is frozen mid-fold, her hands hovering over the white linen.

My father’s watching me now, jaw lockedso tight, I swear I can hear his teeth grinding.

My mother keeps flicking her eyes around, mortified.

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