Page 9 of Own Me

"Sì."

His dark gaze glitters down at my person as he says this, and I fight against the urge to run away.

Memories devour my soul, and I'm back in the cage of my past. It's just me and that monster again in the shower, and bile rises to my throat.

I remember feeling ashamed by my nakedness, remember blaming myself for catching the eye of someone bigger, stronger, and meaner. It was that part of my life which taught me what it truly meant to be prey, in a world ruled by animals whose only thought was to harm me.

I look back at Cesare, and even though he's so much bigger and stronger and meaner than the foster father who tried to force himself on me—-

He's different.

Maybe this is just me finally losing my mind after everything's that happened. Or maybe this is just my hormones going on overdrive, since it's my first time to meet a man I find sexually attractive.

I can't explain it. I just know, I just feel the truth all the way to my soul. Cesare Marchetti isnota good man, but he'snotand willneverbe evil the way my foster father was—-

"Ifwe marry," I begin.

"You mean 'when'we marry," he puts in smoothly.

Like grandmother, like grandson,I can't help thinking, with how both of them are acting like our wedding is already a foregone conclusion.

But while that's obviously not the case, I think I should let it go for now...since I still have a more important question to ask, which is—-

"What kind of marriage do you think we'll have?"

"Are you asking me if I plan to fuck you?"

My face turns red. "No!"

"The answer is yes, by the way."

"I don't care," I manage to choke out...even if I'm not quite sure I'm telling the truth.

"Then perhaps you can elaborate," Cesare invites. "What exactly are you asking, Penelope?"

"I just want to know if we'd be like a normal couple—-"

"Don't normal couples fuck?"

I should've seen that coming, dammit.

"I'm being serious here," I say stiffly. "I need to know—-"

"No, we will not be a normal couple."

Uh...ouch?

"My answer obviously disappoints you."

"Why can't we be a normal couple?"

"Why would you want to be?"

"Is it because you, I mean, is it becausewe, are, uh,famiglia?"

"That's part of the reason, but if you'd really like me to spell it out..."

"Yes!"

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