Page 159 of Powerless

I can’t just walk into his room. Right?

Wrong.

This is a bad idea.

Yes, but this is a bad idea I want to do.

Another anguished cry tears from his throat and I don’t hesitate before throwing open the door. Darkness engulfs me as I once again stumble through a room, eyes straining to see, hands outstretched to guide.

The outline of a bed comes into view, along with the outline of the body atop it. I make my way to him, blinking as my eyes finally adjust to the lack of light, only to roam over his exposed chest, heaving and slicked with sweat.

His head is thrown back against a pillow, strands of inky hair sticking to his forehead. He’s heaving shaky, shallow breaths, every inch of him taut. I can’t even begin to imagine what is haunting his sleep, what is stealing his rest and leaving him so ragged. What nightmare is so terrible that even the prince cannot defend himself?

His lips are moving with murmured words I can’t understand, and now I’m truly worried.

I’m worried about him.

I let the thought sink in for a moment before placing a gentle hand on his shoulder and nearly gasping at the heat of his skin. He’s burning up.

“Kai,” I say softly, not wanting to startle him.

Nothing.

“Kai.” I speak his name louder this time, shaking his shoulder to try and shake him from his nightmare.

He cries out again, and I nearly do the same. Now I’m panting, panicking, pleading with him to wake up so we can go back to bantering instead of begging him to open his eyes.

I climb onto his bed, swinging a leg over his body so he’s pressed between my thighs as I lay both hands on his slick chest. “Kai!” I’m shaking him, hard, willing him to wake.

“Kai!” I’m annoyed that I care so much. Annoyed that I care whether he is hurting or not. Annoyed that I can’t bear to see him like this—

And then those gray eyes snap open.

Strong hands are suddenly gripping my waist and throwing me off him. My back is pressed against the mattress as he pins me down, hands crushing my arms, his body crushing mine.

And then something cold is pressed against my throat.

I’d know the feel of a dagger anywhere, so I don’t bother looking down at the one he is now pushing against my neck. I’m breathing heavily, keeping my eyes locked on his wild ones and my voice soft. “Kai, it’s me.”

His strength is shocking, and I don’t think I could wiggle out from under him even if I tried. He’s panting just as hard as I am, practically paralyzed above me. “Kai. It was just a nightmare.” I keep my voice calm while ignoring my thundering heart that says I’m anything but. “Kai, it’s me. Paedyn.”

He blinks. And then he blinks again, over and over as if clearing his head. As if seeing me for the first time. Cool air coats my neck as he pulls the dagger away, his eyes never straying from mine.

“It’s me. Pae.” My voice trembles, barely more than a whisper now. “Kai?” Then my voice cracks and something seems to crack inside him as well.

He takes a shuddering breath, looking at what he’s done. Releasing my arm from his startling grip, he slides the dagger back under his pillow while trying to calm his breathing. His cool mask has cracked, crumbled in his panic, and I can see every emotion as it flits across his face.

I’ve never seen him so disheveled, so disoriented, so disgusted with himself.

His eyes are haunted, filled with horrors as they wander around the room, refusing to meet my gaze. I can tell he is about to get off me without a word, and I refuse to let that happen. Refuse to forget this moment when the prince was merely a boy.

Those ghostly, gray eyes flutter shut at the feel of my hand on his cheek. I cup his face, timidly, tenderly, as I silently marvel at the feel of him against my palm. His jaw is set, and a muscle feathers in it as I slide my thumb across his cheek.

He ducks his head, eyes still squeezed shut so he doesn’t have to meet mine. “Look at me.” My command is both soft and stern, sure and shaky.

My other hand is on his face now, helping to guide it back up to meet my gaze. He takes a deep, trembling breath before opening his eyes, the steeliness of them as startling as they are stunning.

“Don’t hide from me,” I breathe, suddenly unable to catch my breath with the way he is looking at me. “Not anymore.”

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