Page 38 of Powerful

‘It’s been a week!’

I falter at the realization.

It’s been a week.

A week since I tore that flyer from a crumbling wall, skimming it over to find that Hera was stabbed to death in the first Trial.

A week since I wept in Adena’s arms. Felt her soothing touches. Voiced my guilt, my regret, my fears.

A week since I began mourning the loss of her.

But I’ve cried enough, drowned the pain in my tears. It all feels dull now, though the memory of her is anything but. I’m tired of the tears, the constant state of despair. Hera would scold me for hurting somuch at the loss of her. She would quietly tell me to pull myself together, just as she had so many times over the years.

So, here I am, attempting to do just that. Though I’ve had quite the distraction to keep me company.

‘Fine,’ I say, accepting Adena’s offer. ‘The Fort it is. Thank the Plague I only have to do this one more time after tonight.’

‘Great!’ She squeals slightly, giddy at my agreement. ‘And before I know it, Pae will be back to keep me company.’

Before I can offer my sarcasm, she’s speaking again. ‘Oh, that reminds me! We need to redecorate before she gets home!’

She frowns at the blank look on my face. I gesture around us. ‘Sure, knock yourself out, honey.’

‘Makoto,’ she says sternly. The sound of my full name falling from her lips has my own quirking. ‘It will only take a minute. Come on, up you go.’

After begrudgingly climbing to my feet, I discover that it would not, in fact, take a minute. Adena has me securing yarn on either side of the alley walls, stretching it over the length of the Fort. She then proceeds to stitch squares of fabric across it, creating a colorful banner shelikes to call ‘festive but not seeming too shocked that she survived’.

It wasn’t long before I was being forced to rearrange the assortment of garbage they sleep behind, organizing the barrier in a ‘more appealing manner’, or so she believes. With finishing touches that include a seemingly new blanket and a single pillow to share, I’m finally allowed to take a seat.

‘See!’ Adena claps her hands from where she admires the slightly less shitty sleeping arrangement. ‘So much better. Pae will be so shocked.’

I bite into the sticky bun, my tone mocking as I mutter, ‘Yes, nothing says “welcome home” like a newly arranged pile of garbage.’

She puts a hand on her hip. ‘This pile of garbage is all I’ve got.’

‘I thought you had me?’

Her eyes flutter in a way that makes me wonder how to get her to do it again. ‘Do I?’

I swallow, forcing the feeble words from my mouth. ‘So long as you’ll take me.’

‘And if I don’t?’ she asks softly.

‘Then no one ever will.’

Her eyes wander over me, and I can’t say I dislike thefeel of it. After clearing her throat and looking away timidly, she walks towards the barrier before phasing right through it.

Our shoulders brush when she sits beside me, and I tense at the feel of it. Not because I don’t want her, but because I’m so unused to someone wanting me. Choosing me. Finding me worth the effort.

Because I’m completely undeserving of it. Of her. If darkness is the absence of light, then that is what I am when she is not around. And I wonder how I’ve stumbled this long without her to guide me.

‘What is it like?’ Her question unexpectedly forces me from my thoughts. ‘Having all that power?’

I don’t even hesitate. ‘Lonely.’

‘Because no one knows about you?’

I nod. ‘And I know about everyone else.’

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