Page 48 of The Soldier and the Cowboy

“That’s kind of sad for her. There’s no way Cal would…would he?” He rubbed her back. “Maggie?”

“I don’t know, Cam. Something’s off here, and I can’t put my finger on it. Did he say anything to you about Bailey?”

“He said she’s a friend, a good friend.”

“If you described another woman that way, I’d cut her,” Maggie said. “And then I’d cut you.”

“Yeah, it pinged on my radar, but Cal would never cheat on Isabel. It’s not in his makeup.”

“I don’t know,” Maggie said, blowing out a breath.

“He wouldn’t,” Cam said, his tone defensive.

“I’m not arguing with you. I’m just trying to figure out what’s going on. And I’m sad, so sad. I barely knew her, but it’s still gut wrenching.”

“I know. She and Cal got married when I was still in college, just a kid. I can’t say she was ever the ideal sister-in-law, but she was still my sister-in-law.”

“I know,” Maggie said, cuddling up to him and kissing his cheek.

“Think I should go check on him?”

“How do you know where he went?” she asked.

“There’s probably only one place he’d go.”

“Give them a bit. It seems like he needs some space,” Maggie said.

“Why? I’m his brother.”

“If something happened to me, would you feel like talking the next day?”

He shuddered and drew her closer. “I never want to find out.”

Cal wasin the first place Bailey checked for him, at the watering hole where they’d gone swimming. She slid off her horse and sat down on the grass beside him.

“I felt like I couldn’t breathe,” he explained.

Bailey didn’t comment. She sat silently by his side, offering unspoken comfort. After a few more minutes, he began to talk.

“You know what the worst part is? Behind all the horror, the grief, the shock, the anger, I feel relieved. My wife was murdered, and I feel relieved. What kind of man feels that way?”

“You can’t control your feelings, Cal. They’ll come, they’ll go, they’ll be horrible, they’ll be wonderful. It has nothing to do with who you are. The only thing you can control is what you do with them and you were kind, gentle, caring. You tried to offer her a way out, a hand up. No one could have responded better in that situation or with more integrity. You have nothing to be ashamed about, absolutely nothing.”

“Then why do I feel so bad?” he asked, beginning to cry again. Bailey put her arm around him and let him cry himself out. When his tears came to an end, he wiped his eyes.

“Thanks for being here, Bailey, for being a friend.”

“I wouldn’t be anywhere else,” she said.

“Nothing like pity to bring people together, huh?” Cal said, swiping at his eyes once more.

“You think I pity you?” Bailey asked. She turned to face him.

“Don’t you?” he asked. He finally looked at her, and it was as if the air between them came to a standstill and got sucked away. Now she was the one who couldn’t breathe.

“Yes, I definitely do.” She rested her left hand on his shoulder while her right hand brushed his cheek, wiping the last traces of his tears. “That first day I arrived, when you stepped out onto the porch, I thought, ‘Now there’s a man I’d like to pity. In fact, I don’t ever think I’ve seen a man I’d like to pity more.’ And then I got to know you, and understand the man you are, and the pity grew and grew until I’m so filled with pity I don’t know what to do with myself. I have struggled under the weight of pity, half delirious with it.” He was smiling a little now. Her left hand let go of his shoulder and eased under his shirt, her palm pressing flat against his stomach. “These abs are the most pitiable part of you, I think.”

“Bailey,” he breathed, sucking a breath at her touch.

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