Page 8 of The Stars of the Pack

Marisa gave him a wary look from where she was sitting at her desk. Beyond her, the double bed she shared with her partner was immaculately made up. There was nothing on top of the bureau either, except for a box of tissues. Ray couldn’t even claim it was her child-free life, for all that Cali had moved to a little bed in Clara’s and Maria’s room, she still sneaked out to sleep with her mothers often enough.

“Hey,” he said. “You got a minute?”

“Sure, Ray.”

He stepped into her sanctuary, closing the door behind himself. They’d tried their best to make the rooms sound-proofed, but it was mostly politeness and whispers that kept things private. She swivelled her chair to face him as he sat on the corner of her bed. “I feel like I should keep apologising,” he admitted.

Marisa shrugged, eyebrows raised as if to say so did she. But the superior look didn’t hold. She sighed. “No point.”

“I went out today,” he told her. “It was pretty scary, but it went really well.” He kept his eyes down even as his lips curved upwards at the memory. He wasn’t quite ready to ask her to share his joy yet. “I think I have been cutting myself off from the land without knowing it. I wasn’t listening so... Well, I figure that this happened to get my attention because it was important.” He glanced up.

“To protect the trees?” She didn’t sound convinced.

He could see why she couldn’t see the point in that, not if it meant protecting them fromher. “Yes, to protect the trees, but not just the trees, us too. You. Because the trees are the ones keeping an eye out for us.”

He suddenly remembered his unease around Nicholas—he’d assumed it was his own anxiety at having to force himself to go through with acquiring another mate when he could barely keep up with the ones he already had... But of course he hadn’t just been ignoring his own feelings, but anything the land could have told him through them too.

They were one and the same, his soul a part of the network he’d just realised he was hooked to.

Her lips parted and her eyes moved to the left and then back to him. “Wait, what?”

“I know it sounds a little crazy, but it turns out the whole thing with the territory is not the wolves taking the land and then protecting it from strangers. It’s more like... a contract, or a deal. We give to the land and the land gives to us, so the land is ours and we belong to it too.”

She looked down, hand absently pulling on a loose curl of her hair. “So...” she said, meeting his eyes. “You are saying the trees are part of the pack too?”

“Yes,” he agreed, grinning. She’d always been so smart, but he was particularly impressed she’d got this so quickly when she hadn’t felt it. Unless... “Have you felt it?”

Marisa shook her head. “No. I mean... I don’t think so. What does it feel like?”

“To me, it’s like the territory is singing. Like all the little sounds come together and it’s a song, it’s not just background noise or whatever. And if I pay attention, I get what it means.”

“It sounds beautiful,” she offered. “Does that mean you are okay now? You are not...?”

“I’m more than okay,” he promised, pausing so she could hear his steady pulse. It was the absolute truth. “I have to thank you, for giving them a good reason to hit me so hard. I think... I think I might have locked myself away forever if...” He bit at his lip, swallowing hard against the wave of emotion. He was not going to cry, not now when he’d come to reassure her. Once he was done, he’d go lean his face against the nearest tree and let it take this fear of what had not been. “Thank you,” he said to his sister, not looking away. “I couldn’t do this without you, I hope you know that.”

She stared at him, clearly shocked by his directness. Open declarations weren’t their style, but it was important today. Hell, it was important every day, but Ray was still learning.

“I’m happy to do this with you,” she told him after a few beats, like she too had to find the words that fit. It wasn’t easy when you hadn’t been brought up with the tenderness of speech, when truth was something that frightened you and vulnerability felt like a failure.

They hadn’t failed each other by showing their truth, though, it was exactly why they’d been able to help each other make a life worth living.

“Me too. So I found you a tree.”

***

THE TREE IN QUESTIONwas a pine tree, since he’d wanted to keep some semblance of the tradition. It was also alive, growing a few yards away from the back of the house, with enough room between it and its siblings they could surround it.

Marisa stopped behind him. “It’s beautiful,” she offered.

“It’s actually happy we will come sing to it,” Ray explained, turning to meet her eyes. “I know it’ll be a bit chilly and obviously we can’t leave the presents—”

“We got coats,” she said. “Can we decorate it?”

Ray had actually known to ask. “Trees aren’t all that great with details like that, I think I mostly confused them when I tried to explain,” he admitted. Then he took a bauble out of his pocket, glossy and shiny still after all these years.

“The angel...” Marisa said softly. It’d been everyone’s favourite, and their parents had devised different methods to decide who got to hang it each year, mostly games but sometimes it was given to someone if they’d been particularly generous or kind.

“I thought we could use it to test if it minds,” Ray explained, offering it up to her.

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