Page 73 of The Price of Ice

That morning, Levy had knocked on his door, looking uncertain in his game day suit, and even the formal attire had made Kallen nostalgic. “You’ll be here when I get back, right?”

It was sweet of him, even if Kallen had already told him they didn’t have tickets. “Yeah, I’ll be here. And we can go out for dinner with my mum. My treat.”

His friend hadn’t tried to argue. The previous night he’d already said Kallen’s mother could stay with them, but Kallen had insisted and booked his mum a room in the nearest bed & breakfast. It wasn’t like he wasn’t going to tell her about Levy, but even now that it was as good as over, he didn’t want her tosee.

Maybe he’d just made it all up in his head, how amazing Levy was, how easy it was to be with him. But he couldn’t bear the idea of anyone pointing that out. He was giving it up already, so he didn’t see why he couldn’t keep the memory of it, what it felt like to be free with someone.

“You look like you need some rest,” his mother pointed out.

He’d hooked her up to their internet so she could do some light admin and gone to bed and collapsed on top of the covers.

IT WASN’T LIKE KALLENhadn’t known dinner with Levy and his mother would be a little strange, but he’d somehow forgotten that his flatmate could charm anyone in a matter of minutes. They didn’t even have any food yet and his mother was already laughing at a story about Kallen leaving his socks all over the entrance. Levy had mentioned it once or twice, and Kallen had done his best to stop, but clearly, he hadn’t quite managed.

Levy poked him on the nose, making him flinch back. “Don’t pout, it’s no biggie.”

Kallen rolled his eyes at him. “Then thanks for showing me up, you...” He stopped himself, then grinned. “Silly billy.”

Levy snorted, covering his mouth. “So is that where he gets the ‘sugar’ thing?” he asked Kallen’s mum.

“It’s a perfectly serviceable replacement for more unpleasant words,” she told him very seriously, and because Levy didn’t know her, Kallen got to see him close his mouth with some alarm.

“Mum,” he said pointedly.

And she lost hold of her smile. “I’m teasing you, Levy. So he still says it?” Her green eyes were shining as she glanced at Kallen, fond and full of warmth. “It was one of his first words, you know?”

“Really?” Levy clearly loved the idea. “One of his first words was a fake swear word?”

Kallen shrugged. “With my dad, we didn’t actuallyhaveany sugar at home growing up, so...”

“But wait, don’t babies learn words you repeat a lot?” Levy asked slowly, eyes gleaming as he eyed Kallen’s mum.

She raised both palms in innocence. “Try living with three young boys running around,” she suggested.

After the obligatory roasting, they actually got into more neutral topics. The food, and cooking since both of them loved doing it. Kallen was happy to listen and nod along and enjoy the actual food in front of them—they’d gone to a steakhouse.

The real problem came afterwards when they said goodbye to Levy so he could drive his mum to her accommodation.

“So Levy is a special boy, isn’t he?”

“Man,” Kallen grumbled. “He is a year older than me.”

“Man,” his mum agreed easily. “Does he know how you feel?”

His hands tightened on the wheel. “I’mleaving.”

“Kallen,” her voice was firm but her hand on his shoulder was a comfort. “I know you are, and it’s the right choice, but it doesn’t mean you can’t be sad to leave behind someone who’s special to you.”

He gritted his teeth to keep from snapping at her. It did no good. “I’m not sad, I’mpissed. Heisspecial, and now I have to fucking go.” He resisted the urge to apologise about swearing in front of her.

She let go it all with a sigh. “Fair enough.”

Fair was the last thing it was, which was why he was so angry. But she was quiet until he parked by her accommodation, and when he got out of the car and looked at her, hewassad.

Not even about Levy, about everything he’d built here and was going to kick like a Jenga tower. There had never been any hope of it lasting, and at least this way it wasn’t all falling right on top of him, but... He’d spentyearsof his life on it. Most of the years he could remember, in fact. His mum was standing next to the passenger door when he circled the car, her eyes lost in the distance until he came closer, and she turned her attention on him. “Alright?”

He shrugged. “Will be.”

At least this time he didn’t cry when he hunched over to hug her.

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