Page 55 of Knot Mine

“Woah, man.” He raises his hands, surprised by my sudden flare of aggression as he steps back against the counter. Our gazes lock, and we glare at one another, tension crackling between us like electricity. “Calm down.”

“Just…stay the fuck away,” I snarl, trying not to draw attention but at the same time needing him to know his place.

“What’s your prob—Oh. Ohhhhhhh.” His eyes widen in surprise before he lowers his gaze in submission. We may not always be dominated by our secondary genders, but there were times when an alpha will couldn’t be ignored. Like when placing a Claim on a Mate. Blake was free to challenge me, but we both knew I’d win.

“What’s oh?” Evans asks, slurring his words as he tries to open a bottle of water with his teeth, oblivious to everything like usual.

Hunter’s eyes move between Blake and me, a slow smile spreading on his face. He chuckles, nudging Evans with his shoulder. “Don’t worry about it.”

Finally managing to open the bottle, Evans squeezes it a little too hard, making water splash out and all down his bare chest. He barely seems to notice that he’s dripping as he begins sniffing the air, his tongue flicking out over his bottom lip. “Seriously, can anyone smell toffee? Who’s hiding it because it’s a total dick move to bring caramel and not share.”

I freeze, if the others could scent Shiloh and the pheromones are leaking out all over the place, that could only mean one thing. His heat was coming.

Chapter Twenty-One

Shiloh

When Zale leaves my room, after turning my entire body into jelly and sucking my brain out of my dick I click the lock into place.

What the fuck was I doing? Every time he touched me or whispered ‘baby’ against my skin, I seemed to lose all my reasoning skills.

Was I dickmatized? Isn’t that what Bell called it when the sex was so good, that everything else, even the giant red flags, just fell to the wayside?

I mean, what other reason could there be for getting my cock sucked by the college golden boy while my sister, his girlfriend, was downstairs surrounded by all of their friends. It felt like I was intruding on a slice of their life, an unwelcome guest.

How could he possibly want me? Romilly was everything I wasn’t. She was his girlfriend. It wasn’t a fair comparison.

In this together? We weren’t together. In fact, other than our social class, we were poles apart. Completely opposite sides of the world, my friend.

The more tightly wound I became in this web of lies and sex, the harder it was to cut the strings. Why did I keep lettinghim in? There was no future for us, so the only person this was hurting was me.

He was making promises he couldn’t keep. Promises I couldn’t expect him to keep if I wanted my sister to be happy. And she deserved to be happy.

Standing with my back against the door, silent tears run down my face as I listen to him promise to join her and her flirty offer to shower with him.

I gag, once again aware of how much of a hypocrite I am. He said we were in this together, but then he went. But I wanted him to go. I know it doesn’t make sense, but nothing does right now.

The suffocating feeling that has been growing all day, finally bursts inside my chest, forcing me down onto my hands and knees with heaving breaths.I was a fucking monster.I was a selfish person, pushing him away with one hand and clinging on with the other knowing that it was only going to make us both miserable.

This wasn’t like coveting my sister’s favorite toy, this was playing with her future. She wanted to marry this alpha, have his children, be his trophy wife parading around for everyone to see.

And every time I kissed him, I was tainting that dream. Tarring it with my jealousy and my own twisted desires.

I can’t hold back the sobs that rack my body. All I can do is make them quieter as I bite down on my knuckle until my teeth break the skin. Watching the blood trickle down my hand I realize I can’t stay here. I don’t give a fuck if it’s my birthday tomorrow, I couldn’t survive another night under the same roof as Zale Blackwood still keep what was left of my shredded sanity.

Pushing to my feet, I run my hands through my hair. Forcing my jaw to unclench, I push back my shoulders. I didn’t survive this long by letting my emotions rule me. I needed to come up with a plan, and quickly before I was lost to my heat and then who knew what would happen.

Texting Zion, I let him know that I’m going into heat early and that I’ll call him in a couple of days to discuss coming off my suppressants. I couldn’t risk anything like this happening again

Then I shower. While under the hot jets, scrubbing myself for what must be the millionth time in the last two days, I feel even more raw. It was him. It had to be. Being near Zale and the other alphas was making my heat come quicker and more intensely.

Once I’m out of the bathroom, I find my bottle of suppressants and tip out a handful onto the counter. I’d been taking two or three every morning, noon and night but to make the drive home I was going to need to up the dose.

Swallowing five, I wince at the bitter aftertaste. Why was it possible to make children's medicine taste like strawberry, but adult medication tasted like acid? If I thought crushing them and snorting them like coke would make them any more effective, I would do it. Hell, I would shove them up my ass, that’s how desperate I was for this current wave to ease. If it didn’t, I might just sneak into Zale’s room, steal his clothes and build myself a nest which was counterproductive to what I was trying to do here.

This many pills wouldn’t stop me from releasing pheromones, I was too far gone for that. But it might lower them and fight off the heat haze for long enough so that I could get home in one piece.

Shoving the things I brought with me back into my backpack, I snatch my keys off the bedside table and shove my phone into my pocket. Sitting on the edge of my bed, I try to calm my breathing for a moment and give the pills a chance to kick in. If I left now, I could be home in the early hours and ride out my heat at the apartment. I usually used my parents’ house in Oakley since Bell didn’t know I was an omega, but my heat had been so infrequent over the years, it had never been an issue. Closing myeyes, I tilt my head back and ignore the nausea working its way up my throat.

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