“I’m not avoiding you, and you didn’t do a thing wrong. I’m just trying not to overwhelm you. Trying to keep my distance, you know? That’s some scary shit that I put you through, and I don’t want to be responsible if you decide to pretend the whole thing never happened.”
“Hold up.” Anna held her palm out in front of him. “First, you are a thousand percent responsible for the fact that I even had anything to eat beyond cupcake wrappers and cereal box cardboard. And second, why the hell would I want to pretend any of this never happened?”
“Because I almost set your house on fire,” he hissed, his flare of aggression catching her off guard. “Because you have a baby growing inside you, one that relies on you to be as happy and healthy as possible. You don’t need the stress that comes with living in my world, Anna.”
“Don’t tell me what I need,” she gritted out. “Did you ever stop and think that maybe I needed to feel special, for once? That it felt goddamn wonderful to kiss you, to feel you kiss me back, to actually have someonewantto kiss me back, even though I’m pregnant with another man’s child?”
She lowered her shoulders away from her ears and tried not to let the wave of disappointment take her out again. “It wasnice, Iron, being with you, having you here. I kind of forgot how lonely it can be sometimes, and how frickin’ hard it is pretending that being single and pregnant is no big deal. So, yeah, I’ve been a little starved for company lately, and even though I don’t understand your worldyet,” she emphasized, hoping like hell he got her meaning, “I’m willing to be overwhelmed by it for a little bit if it means I can keep seeing you from time to time.” Then Anna plucked down the thought she’d been worrying over all day. “But if my pregnancy bothers you so much?—”
Iron’s hand stilled on the doorknob. “You have no idea what you’re asking, Anna.”
She tried not to cringe when he silently sidestepped around her fear in favor of spotlighting his own. “So, tell me. Keep talking. I like talking. Hell, I talk into a computer for a living. You’d be surprised to find that I’m actually really good at it.”
A smile teased the corner of his lips, and she had the audacity to hope that it was enough to convince him to keep talking to her.
“If you leave,” she added, “will I see you again, in person or otherwise?” Theotherwisein question being a dreamworld that held even more unanswered secrets than the ones he clearly wasn’t yet willing to share with her.
“I don’t know.”
White-hot slashes whipped across her memory, scraping new gouges of abandonment into her war-torn flesh. “Oh.”
“But I’ll call you. Look,” he said, running his hand through his hair, “I don’t know how to keep you and your baby from getting wrapped up in my world—a verydangerousworld.”
“You found me, though. That shard of the relic, it was seeking me out, wasn’t it?”
“Yes,” he agreed. “And that’s why I need to go, at least for a little while. Now that I know what it was pointing me toward, I want to try and figure out what it all means.”
“You mean, beyond just getting your full power back through the soul bond?”
“Yeah.”
“I don’t understand. Isn’t that something you want regardless, after so long being without it?” It was as close to repeating her earlier plea as she could bring herself to mention without groveling and completely hating herself in the morning.
Iron’s gaze struck her, and she gasped at the fiery topaz flames burning there. “More than anything.”
“Then why can’t we at least get to know each other better?”
“Because I have enemies, demons who would love nothing more than to slit your throat and watch the light of your soul bleed out just to fuck with me.”
A dark coldness snaked along her skin, and Iron’s even darker grin froze her body further.
“That’s right, Anna. The beings I kill don’t go down quietly, and they aren’t above using the most brutal tactics to ensure they get what they want. Which is why I need to be sure I’m doing the right thing here.”
“What is the right thing?”
“Keeping you safe from my sins.”
“What sins?”
Iron shook his head. Exhaustion had carved lines into his features. “I don’t want to do this.”
“This? You mean deal with me?”
“No.”
“Then what?”
“I just . . . I just need some time to figure things out.”