Page 108 of For the Win

I scowl.“I work hard!”

“I know you do,” she says quickly.“But...there have been times where I think you haven’t really given your all.”

Shit.That’s just what Coach said.I stare at her.“People expect me to be like Dad.But I’m not.”

She smiles.“That’s exactly my point, you’re not.You’re your own person, with different strengths and different flaws.I think...if you feel you can’t be like your dad, sometimes you don’t try to be your best.Yourbest.”

Our gazes hold for a moment, then I look down at my feet again, processing.“I don’t know who I even am,” I say quietly.“I just know what I’m supposed to be.”

“You’re supposed to beyou.Nobody else.We’ve never expected that of you.”She grips my hand.“Believe in yourself.Take the risk of giving it your all.Win or lose, then you know you’ve done that.”

“It’s not winning or losing, it’s how you play the game.”I shoot her a wry smile.“You know who says that?Losers.Losers and their coaches.”

She chuckles.“I know winning is important.Especially if you’re a Wynn.”She glances at Dad with amused affection.“Do you remember what I told you about losing, when you were younger?”

I screw up my face.“Uh...”

“It was a quote from Nelson Mandela.He said, ‘I never lose.I either win or learn.’”

I nod.“Yeah, I remember that.”

“I tried to teach you that so you would learn from your losses.And grow and be better and stronger.But if you don’t learn anything...then youhavelost.”

Oh man.Mom knows how to get a knife straight to the heart of the matter.

“And I’m not just talking about hockey games,” she adds.“I’m talking about life.”

I blink at her.

“Here’s another saying.If you try, you risk failure.If you don’t, you ensure it.Take a risk.Give it your all.”

I slowly sit up straighter.That rips a hole in my gut.“You really think I’ve done that?That I’m lazy?”

“No!Not lazy.That’s not what I’m saying at all.I’m saying maybe it’s fear that’s holding you back.”

I gape at her.

“And I’m sure you’ve never even realized it.”

I stand abruptly.I’ve had enough of this conversation.I feel shitty enough without Mom pointing out my failings.Fear?Jesus!

“I have to go.Good talk, Mom.”I start toward the door.

“Harrison.”Dad speaks up.

I turn and look at him.

“Iamproud of you.Don’t ever doubt it.I love you.You’re a good man.That’swhat matters.That’ssuccess.”

Pressure builds behind my cheekbones and my eyes burn.Jesus.

I walk back to Dad.He wraps his arms around me and we hug it out.“I love you too, Dad,” I choke out, squeezing my eyes shut at the stinging.I slap his back, then step away to leave before I burst into blubbering tears.

I nearly make it out of the building, but I run into Everly.She gives me a sharp look.“What’s wrong?”

I sigh and rub my face.“Nothing.”

“Riiiight.Come in here.”She grabs my arm and drags me into her office.“You look terrible.”

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