Page 92 of Breakaway

Shit.

“I told you, Remi, I haven’t seen her since we broke up. Other than that night at Rouge. We were done.”

“Birth control?” She managed to squeeze the words out between tight lips.

“She was on the pill.” He looked at her, anguish in his eyes, and she believed him. “She doesn’t know what happened either. It just…did. She’s not happy about this either, Remi. She’d just been offered a job by Victoria’s Secret and now she won’t be able to do it.”

Oh, that was really too bad. But again, a hot wave of shame washed over her. Modeling was also a perfectly legitimate career choice.

“So she’s going to have the baby.”

“Yes.” Jase nodded. “She wants to have the baby. I can’t…I…”

“What do you want?”

He lifted shiny eyes to hers. “I don’t know, Remi. This messes up my life so bad, but…it’s a baby. I can’t tell her to have an abortion.”

“It’s her right to choose,” she murmured. “Whatever her choice is.”

“Yes.”

“But it affects you too. You’ll be a father, Jase.”

“I know.” He groaned and tipped his head back. “God, I know. I’ve been thinking about this so much.”

“So Saturday you found out, you…what? Went out and got drunk?”

“Yeah.” He bowed his head, hands on his knees, his knuckles still scabbed from the fight he was in. “I did. Not proud of that. Not proud of how I acted. All I can say is, I was hurting. Like I’ve never hurt before.”

“It’s not that bad.” She tried to play it cool. “Most people become a parent at some point, Jase. It’s not like you’re fifteen or something.”

He frowned. “It’s not that. Well, it’s partly that. Being a father scares the hell out of me. I don’t know if I can do it. But I was more upset because…well, because of you.”

Her eyes went wide. Her insides knotted. She clutched her pillow tighter. “Me.”

“Yes.” Again, agony filled his dark eyes as he stared at her. His hand moved on his knees, like he wanted to reach for her, but held back. “I just found you, Remi. I love you. After what we went through—I was so happy. Yeah, I was afraid of commitment andmarriage—until I met you. When you’re with the right woman it’s not scary any more. You’re the right one. I love you. And I was fuckingdyingthinking about telling you about this, knowing how hurt you were going to be. This is the worst thing in the world that could have happened.”

Oh. She stared back at him, her stomach flipping around inside.

He rubbed his eyes. “I should have just come and told you right away. I acted like an idiot and I’m sorry. My coach is pissed off at me, the team’s pissed off at me, my parents are pissed off at me, you’re pissed off at me. Shit.”

She nodded, but was softening inside, her heart thawing just a little.

But fear still held her in an icy grip.

“What are you going to do?” she asked him, voice shaky.

“I don’t know.” He swallowed. “I knew I had to tell you about it. That’s why I came to see you the other day. But I still don’t know what I’m going to do.”

“Do you still care about Brianne?”

“No. Well…” His hesitation was like a slap in the face and she flinched. “I care about her as a friend. We were together a long time. But I don’t love her, Remi. I love you. Please, please believe that.”

She drew in a long shaky breath, and nodded.

“But I do care about my child,” he continued, his voice so low and deep she had to listen carefully. “I know I have to do the right thing for my child. I just don’t know what that is. Is it being with Brianne?”

She jerked and blinked. He shrugged his big shoulders.

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