Page 96 of Breakaway

She understood responsibility and she got why Jase had to step up. She wouldn’t love him as much if he had done anything else, if he had tried to ignore the baby, pretend it wasn’t his, deny his duty. He would never do that. Because it was his child and he was doing the same thing she had—anything he had to for that child. For love.

Her heart squeezed painfully and she took in a shaky breath.

But how much should Jase sacrifice for the sake of his child?

When Darryl had given her that ultimatum—him or her family—she hadn’t even considered it. Now she knew that was because she hadn’t really loved him , not the way she loved Jase—with her whole heart, her soul, her mind and her body. So she’d let Darryl go, continued on with her life, doing what she had to do.

She wandered into her bedroom and looked at the boxes halffull of things. She stood in front of her dresser, staring at her watch, a pair of earrings and…the bear Jase had built for her, that day at Navy Pier, in his little Chicago Wolves uniform. A sharp stab of pain pierced her heart as she reached for the bear, remembering that day, the crazy fun they’d had. She’d probably fallen in love with him that day.

She hugged the bear, pressing her cheek to the soft fur, aching inside as memories of that day rolled through her head. She’d been so happy, so carefree. “Remi is beary beautiful.” Jase’s voice spoke from inside the bear and the tears fell harder and the ache intensified.

Why did she have to let him go? Why didhehave to lethergo? Parents together “for the sake of the children” was a huge mistake. Nobody these days expected a man in that position to ask the woman to marry him—did they? Wasn’t that the worst reason to get married? Especially if the relationship had ended and they didn’t love each other anymore? Wouldn’t that just be doomed to failure? And what kind of life would that be for their child if they stayed together and were miserable?

The questions bounced around in her aching head until she felt it might split open. She rubbed her temples. Think, Remi. Think.

She’d sacrificed a lot in her life. And she didn’t regret it. But she wasn’t going to let Jase sacrifice his whole life. There was more than one way to take responsibility for something.

She surged to her feet, then stood there for a moment, mind racing. She had to talk to him. She had to talk to himnow.

She glanced wildly at her watch, but she wasn’t wearing one. The alarm clock beside the bed said nearly one. Where would he be? Practice? At home? She had to find him.

She grabbed her purse and was fishing for her keys when she realized she was still dressed in pajamas. With a growl of annoyance, she dropped her bag to the bed and reached for some clothes.

When the phone rang, she dove for it, somehow the idea that Jase might be calling her implanted in her mind. But it was the realtor, calling to tell her there was an offer on the house.

“A great offer,” he said.

“Wonderful,” she huffed, trying to get out of her pajama pants with the phone tucked between shoulder and ear. Just what she needed. “That was fast.”

“I can come over right now.”

“No. No. I have to go out somewhere. I’ll call you later.”

“Remi, you don’t want to lose this offer.”

“I…I have something important to do. Please. I’ll call you later.”

She had to talk to Jase.

Chapter Eighteen

She called his cell phone, but he didn’t answer. She drove to his apartment, but he wasn’t home. Remi stood on the street in front of his apartment building, biting her lip, wondering if he was with Brianne. She had no idea where Brianne lived and she didn’t think she had the nerve to go there anyway. The other place he could be was the arena. They were likely practicing for tomorrow night’s game.

When she walked in the front doors of the arena, she gazed around in wonder. The cavernous, empty building was such a contrast to the way it was during a game, packed with people, buzzing with noise and energy. A few of the food places were open, but only a couple of people sat drinking coffee near the donut shop. As she crossed the concrete floor, she could hear noises from the ice, the crack of a stick against the puck, the duller thud of the puck hitting the goalie’s pads, the scratching of sharp skates on ice, echoing voices.

“Go, go, go!” a voice yelled, presumably the coach. She approached one of the entrances and stood there looking down at the ice through the mesh that closed off the ice from the concourse.Sounds echoed in the arena, bouncing off empty seats and the rafters high above.

The players skated around in some kind of drill, taking turns with the puck racing to the net. They weren’t wearing their uniforms, so she couldn’t find Jase.

She knew where the only entrance was to the bowl, and walked around the concourse to it. She’d briefly met the security guy once when Jase had introduced her, and he smiled and nodded at her as she walked past, holding her breath.

She descended the steps, right behind the bench in the section she’d sat in during the games she’d attended. A few seats were occupied in the arena, sports reporters from the newspapers, one guy she recognized from TV who called the Wolves play-by-play.

She searched out Jase on the ice, her eyes finally lighting on one of the biggest guys in the practice jerseys, who’d just skated to the bench and stood talking to the coach, his hands resting on the top of his stick. There he was.

She blinked, clasped her hands together and watched him. She couldn’t hear what he was saying, just the animated tone of his voice and the coach nodding.

And then he looked up at her.

---