Page 89 of Royal Reluctance

“So is thinking it’s your fault because she picked you up. Mom told me once that she really liked giving us rides to practice or someone’s house because she could have us all to herself.”

She blinks frantically and I know she’s as close to tears as I am. “She said that?”

“It was a storm, Lyra. The bridge was slippery. If she was happy—it’s no one’s fault.”

“I keep trying to tell myself that,” she pleads. “Somedays it’s still so hard.”

“Keep trying, little sis. Because, trust me, when you realize that it wasn’t your fault?” I draw a shaky breath. “It feels pretty good.”

“You’ve been living with that for all these years.” Lyra’s voice is gentle. “Bo…”

“Yeah.”

Lyra takes a deep breath, and then another. “And this is why Hettie left?” I nod. “Why did she come back? Are you back together?”

“She wants a divorce.”

“You’re still married? It’s been years.”

“For now. But there’s more—”

She snorts. “Of course there is.”

“Hettie has a kid.” The words tumble over each other to get out. “A little girl.Mylittle girl.”

I’ve never seen my sister speechless, and it’s kind of funny. “She has a baby?”

“Tema is seven.”

I see her do the math. “And she’s yours?”

I give a shaky laugh. “She looks like you at that age.”

Lyra stares, open-mouthed. “This I have to see,” she finally manages. “I’ll catch the first flight back.”

And then she hangs up.

31

Hettie

After I leave Mabel,I go for a walk along the pier before I call for a car to take me back to the castle, just like Bo and Spencer told me to.

It might take a while to get used to that.

But it doesn’t take long at all for me to feel the old dread and frustration when I think of my family.

Eight years of not worrying about them, of not being hurt by their actions. Of not meeting people and wondering if they’re judging me because of my brothers. If they think I’m just like them, only in a prettier package.

If I stayed in Battle Harbour, I could see Mabel all the time.

If I stayed, I’d have to deal with my brother Reggie.

Not that I ever had much to do with him. Mabel kept the worst of it from me. I know he burnt down the McKibbons’ barn, and set fire to a dumpster outside the high school.

There was a rumour about him stealing from Clay Whiskey, one of the fishermen that my father knows. Bar fights, street fights. I think he tried to steal a car once, but I blame my brother Hank for that.

Mabel says I don’t make it easy on myself, but I learned that from my family. Reggie had opportunities, as much as the rest ofus did, and he chose crime. Same as my brother Lloyd, who let his temper get the best of him. I’m sure there are other reasons to kill a man, but Lloyd did it because he was mad and drunk.

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