Page 82 of Royal Reluctance

If this was my office, I would definitely get better furniture.

I haven’t managed to say anything, mainly because I don’t have a clue what to say. Do I blurt out some of the lowlights of my life, like losing Mom? Losing Hettie? And then we could start the discussion about how it’s all my fault.

That doesn’t sound productive. Or fun. Plus, I’ve already stepped up to take the blame. What’s going to change there?

I give her a weak smile and she takes that as encouragement.

“How are you, Bo?” Dr. Patel breaks the silence and my spiral of thoughts. “Or should I call you Your Highness?”

“Bo. Just Bo.”

She glances at the notebook she’s holding. “Prince Bowden Eugene Jerome Leif Erickson. That’s quite the handle.”

“Just Bo,” I repeat. I’ve always wondered how my parents came up with our names. As far as I know there’s no one on either side of the family with the name Eugene. Did they just decide on random names? Pick a letter—let’s do Jerome for J.

“I would say you’re more than ‘Just Bo.’” D. Patel flips through the notebook. “You’ve been quite successful in the lumberjack world. I’m afraid I don’t know much about the sport, but I saw videos of you. It’s quite exciting—very impressive.”

I shift in the chair. “Thanks. I don’t really do that anymore.”

“No? Championships three years running and suddenly you retire? Were you injured?”

“No.”

“Too much attention put on you. You don’t like the spotlight, do you?” Her brown-eyed gaze holds me and suddenly, it’s like I’m stripped naked and sitting here, shivering in the chill of the castle. “Is that true? Your brothers and Princess Lyra have always seemed to seek the spotlight, but not you. You tend to stay in the background. Why is that?”

I lift a shoulder. How am I supposed to answer that? “The—the others,” I stammer. “They’re better at it. The people and the pictures and the questions. I’ve never been good at it.”

“And does that mean you’re less important? That you’re not a full committed member of the royal family because you don’t like talking to reporters?”

“Jeez.” I rub the back of my head. “You don’t beat around the bush, do you?”

Dr. Patel chuckles. “I don’t see any reason to wait until you’re more comfortable with me or this process because I doubt you will be.”

“Got that right,” I mutter.

“And, Bo, there’s nothing wrong with feeling that way. Being put on the spot? Forced to share personal things with complete strangers? That’s never easy for anyone, so if you think your siblings are better at it, it’s just because they’re able to develop a persona that can deal with it.”

“A persona?”

She nods. “We’ll get into that. But I just need you to understand you’re not alone with being uncomfortable dealing with the press.”

“Okay.” I’m totally confused now.

“Have you ever spoken to your siblings about how they feel about being a member of the royal family?” she asks.

Have I…? There’s always been comments about this reporter or that, complaints about being forced into suits and ties to attend an event or a meeting that will inevitably put me to sleep. But has anyone asked? Have we ever really talked about what being part of this family means?

“I guess not,” I admit. “I know Kalle doesn’t love it, but he can handle things.”

“I get the sense that you don’t think you’d be an effective ruler. Is this solely because you don’t like talking to the press?” she prompts.

That question feels like she’s kicked my shin to get my attention. “It sounds stupid when you say it like that,” I protest. She cocks her head at me, and I feel my face flame. I rub the back of my head like the answers are going to be found there. “It is stupid.”

“It’s not at all stupid. You’re an introvert, Bo. Possibly shy. Definitely reserved, and you prefer to limit communication until you’re comfortable. None of these traits mean you would not be a successful king of Laandia, if it ever came to that.”

“It won’t.”

“It could,” she corrects. “I think that’s the problem. You were born the third son. Middle children always get a bad rap, but that’s not the problem here. You were born into a family who has a responsibility to govern a country and its people. You didn’t askfor this; none of you did. But as a third son, you never expected to take over after your father. No one expected it, and therefore you have lived your life never imagining it.”

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