“He shouldn’t have to ask me,” I shot back. “I should just be there.”
“You don’t have to be everywhere all at once to be a good rancher,” Teddy said. “It seems like you’re just carrying weight you don’t have to.”
“You don’t get it,” I said.
“I think I do, actually,” Teddy remarked. “You think that it’s okay for people to depend on you, but you don’t want anyone else to have the pressure of you depending on them.” I didn’t like the way she said it—like me looking out for the people Icared about was a bad thing—and I didn’t want to get into this with her.
I sat on the other end of the couch with a stack of children’s books—new ones that Riley and I hadn’t read yet. I cracked one open and saw Teddy glance over with an eyebrow raised. She went back to reading her paperback—which I could now see had a shirtless man in a kilt on the cover.
Christ.
It was quiet for a few minutes, and I focused on the book in front of me. One of my favorite things that my dad did when I was a kid was read aloud to me, and I wanted to do that for Riley.
But because I was dyslexic, I had a hard time reading new material out loud without stumbling, and it made me feel like a fucking idiot, so when we bought new books, I read them to myself a few times before I read them out loud to her. It helped.
“Is that your preferred reading material?” Teddy asked from the other side of the couch.
“Yep,” I said, not wanting to explain any further about why I was reading about a piglet making friends with a bunny.
“Interesting choice,” Teddy said.
“Says the woman who’s reading porn on my couch right now,” I quipped. I knew a bodice ripper when I saw one.
“This is way better than porn,” Teddy said, holding up her book. “Plus, I haven’t gotten to the sex yet. The hero and heroine are too busy fumbling around each other to realize that the reason it feels like all the oxygen has been sucked out of the room every time they touch is because they’re in love.” She sighed.
“Nothing says love like suffocation,” I grumbled.
I could practically hear Teddy roll her eyes at me. “You know,” I said without looking over at her or her legs, “if you keep rolling your eyes like that, they’re going to get stuck.”
She let out a little puff of air that could’ve been a laugh, but I didn’t really know what Teddy’s laugh sounded like—at least her real one. I knew the maniacal villain one that she often used with me—like nails on a chalkboard.
“Yes, Daddy,” she said sarcastically, and I straightened my spine, trying to stop the blood from rushing downward. What the fuck was wrong with me?
“Don’t call me that,” I snapped.
Teddy laughed—the maniacal villain laugh—and said “Why? Does it get you all hot and bothered?” I gritted my teeth and didn’t answer, which was a mistake because Teddy laughed harder and said, “It does, doesn’t it? Is that what you’re looking for, Gussy? A nice girl to call you Daddy?”
“Fuck off, Teddy.”
“I knew you had a kinky side,” she said, still chuckling.
I slammed Riley’s book shut and stood up, hoping that my briefs and sweatpants were doing enough to cover what was happening to me below the waist—as if she couldn’t get any more infuriating. “Good night, Teddy,” I gritted out, and stomped toward my bedroom.
“Good night, Daddy!” she called after me.
Chapter 13
Teddy
I’d always been an early riser, and even if I wasn’t, I wouldn’t have had a choice but to be one. My dad used to bring me to Rebel Blue every day before I was old enough to start school. Emmy and I would spend the day barefoot in the grass or running along the trails that ran through the ranch. It was still one of my favorite things—feeling the earth beneath my bare feet and looking up at the big blue sky. Rebel Blue was the only place where I felt like I could be grounded and steady while also having my head in the clouds.
Oh, to be so free again.
So I wake up early. I always have. That didn’t change when I stayed at Gus’s—even though my sofa bed was surprisingly comfortable—everything about Gus’s house was comfortable.
Except Gus, obviously.
When I woke up on Wednesday morning and looked at my phone, it was almost five. I usually ran on Wednesday mornings, and running through Rebel Blue Ranch—with shoes these days—sounded like a good way to start my day.