Page 149 of On Thin Ice

A year later

Jacob told himself he wasn’t freaking out, but he kind of was.

They were sitting on the couch, watching ESPN, Finn curled up next to him, breathing relaxed and even, and Jacob felt like a rubber band about to snap.

At least he wasn’t alone. He’d had to silence his phone because Morgan had sent too many texts in the last few hours.

Jacob wasn’t sure which of them was more enthusiastic than Finn was finally making his NHL debut tomorrow night. Finn seemed ready. Calm and prepared. Jacob was excited for him. Morgan was . . .well, Morgan was Morgan-ing all over the place.

“Hey, you need to relax,” Finn said sleepily next to him. It was early still, not quite eight, but Jacob knew in an hour or two Finn would head to bed, to get a good night’s rest, and it seemed he’d actually sleep.

Jacob didn’t know how he was going to sleep.

“I’m relaxed,” Jacob claimed.

It wasn’t like he didn’t think Finn was prepared; he’d never been more ready. He was physically and mentally in such a great spot right now, and everyone in the Sentinels’ organization was eager for him to get on the ice.

But Jacob still remembered his own debut. How he’d not slept a wink the night before. How he’d been sure he’d collapse right there on the ice from sheer nerves.

Was Finn hiding it? Would he eventually realize what was about to happen and panic the same way Jacob had? And what if Jacob wasn’t there to calm him down?

If that happens, it’ll still be okay, because Finn has Finn.

Jacob tried to even out his breathing and knew he’d failed because Finn looked over at him, amusement in his eyes.

“You’re the last thing from relaxed,” Finn teased. He ran his fingertips up Jacob’s T-shirt-clad chest. “Maybe I should do something about that.”

Jacob cleared his throat, wishing that was going to be enough. But Finn had already given him a spine-meltingly good blowjob a few hours ago. If that hadn’t taken care of his anxiety, nothing was going to do it.

“Do you . . .are you really not nervous?” Jacob wanted to smack himself the moment the words escaped him.

Finn smiled. “No, not really. Excited, yeah. But nothing bad.”

“Good. Good.” Jacob felt like a useless lump.

“I couldn’t be more ready, you know?” Finn’s eyes glowed with happiness and contentment.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. And you should take some of the credit for that,” Finn said seriously.

“Some?”

“Well, notall,” Finn said, chuckling. “But yeah, some. I told you, I wanted you to help me, and you did. And I told you I wanted you next to me, that it would be meaningful to havesomeone who’d gone through it, and you were there. Every step of the way.”

It hadn’t been easy, always.

Jacob hadn’t really wanted to leave the house in Portland and move to Tampa, for example. But he’d done it. After all, he’d come to realize during this last year that home wasn’t a four-walled structure, but aperson.

Finn was his happy place, his touchstone, his everything.

Besides, the house in Portland would always be there, whenever Finn was finished being extraordinary at hockey and ready to tackle being extraordinary at something else.

“Of course. I love you.”

Finn sighed, all comfortable contentment as his fingers dug into the fabric of Jacob’s shirt. “Love you, too. You and my dad sitting together tomorrow?”

“Morgan says so.” He had,at length. To the point where the last text Jacob had read before he’d silenced Morgan was,you’d better be there tomorrow with me or I’m gonna lose my shit.

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