Page 44 of Love, Luck & Clusterf*ck

We stopped in front of the cashier, and she looked up through her glasses. “Are you going to be eating that, Adam, or just playing today?”

“I can do both.” He took a large bite. “Mmm… chin-dripping delicious. I just love pears. Wanna bite my pear,Perry?” He held it up to my mouth but I batted it away.

“Are you comparing me to a pear?”

“Only on the inside, baby.” He bit down and made a loud slurping noise.

I shook my head. Dork-ass. I paid for my soda, then turned around to notice Stephen standing within earshot, pouring a cup of coffee. By his expression, I could ascertain that he’d heard everything.

Lovely.

Perry Sommers: Seriously? Are you trying to give me nightmares tonight?

Adam Zepecki: I’m trying to help you get over your fears.

Perry Sommers: I wish I had some holy water to throw on it.

Adam Zepecki: What is wrong with you, woman? He’s adorable. Ababy. We’re starting off small here.

Perry Sommers: Yeah, a freakingmonkeybaby.

I’d come back from break to find a picture of a baby monkey wearing a blue bonnet propped up against my monitor, compliments of Adam. I immediately placed it facedown.

Stephen passed behind me just as my chat window flashed with a new message.

Adam Zepecki: You need more help than I can give.

I quickly minimized it, but knowing his eagle eyes, I was sure he saw. But since I wasn’t technically doing anything wrong, I’d probably just implied it by hiding the evidence.

Stephen picked up the picture. “What’s this?”

“It’s—” Another pop-up.

Adam Zepecki: Maybe your parents locked you in a monkey enclosure when you were a child. You should check into that.

Dammit, Adam.That time I completely exited out, which is what I should’ve done in the first place.

“It’s nothing,” I told Stephen. “Just an inside joke.”

He set the horrid thing down without commenting and went back to his office. I expected at least Adam would be summoned, but it was soon forgotten. The nonstop ringing phones seemed to take precedence.

“FiTech, this is Perry speaking.”

“Yeah, my card is stuck at the 7-Eleven over on State. I need it back.”

Great, another one. “I’m sorry, sir, but you need to contact your financial institution.”

“The lady here said to call you.”

“Then she has the incorrect information. We don’t handle—”

“Listen, bitch. Either you give me back my card or—”

I pressed Hold and glanced over at Kate, who was also on the phone. I’d never been sweared at or threatened yet, so I didn’t know if it was acceptable to just hang up. I waved my hand, but she just stuck up a finger telling me to hold on.

The button light went out. I guess it didn’t matter anyway because he was gone and another call was coming in.

“FiTech, this is Perry.”

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