Page 58 of Love, Luck & Clusterf*ck

I reached out my hand, not knowing what she was going to put in it. I didn’t care. I trusted her. I was hovering in that dangerous state somewhere between extremely wasted and still mobile. That place where people jumped off roofs.I made some homemade wings—do you wanna come fly with me? Sure, why not? Sounds like a great idea.Splat.

I wrapped my fingers around something long and skinny. Then I looked down. “What the hell is wrong with you, Christa?” I dropped it and she picked it back up. “A fucking needle?”

I couldn’t even. I’d rather jump off a roof. I was going to have to find my phone right the fuck now and check her into rehab.

“I’m not fucking shooting up. What the hell, Perry?”

“Then why do you have a damn needle?” Oh wait. Oh shit. “No, Christa. Don’t even think about it. God, you brought this home from the clinic, didn’t you? You are not injecting fucking botulism into my forehead.”

“Damn, girl. Get a grip. I’m not sticking anything into your face.”

“Then why do you even have this?” Ugh. I felt squeamish. “Tell me this wasn’t already in someone’s face.”

“Of course not. It was in my stomach.” What the…. “Well, not that exact syringe. It’s just one left over. I knew it’d come in handy again someday.”

Right. I’d almost forgotten that she’d tried out some wacky diet a couple years back where she shot hormones into her stomach every morning. I cringed just thinking about it. It hadn’t lasted too long, fortunately. She’d turned into a complete bitch during that time.

She set down a small bottle of something. Deer urine. Deer. Urine.Deer urine?“Where did you get this?” I. Couldn’t. Even.

“Hunting supply store.”

“Just what kind of freaky shit are you into, Christa?” Last I’d checked she was not a hunter, so what kind of sane non-hunter person had deer urine lying around?

“Just come on. You promised.”

“Promised what? I think I’d remember promising anything that involved animal piss.”Or would I? Damn.

She gripped my arm and pulled me sharply towards her. The room started twirling again. A new wave of haze descended over me. I was definitely in some dream. Yeah, that was it. Christa was my best friend. Not some crazed lunatic who kept needles and urine in her drawer.

“If I tell you too much you won’t do it. And youneedto do it, Perry. You need to get revenge on that cheating scumbag.”

“But how can I do something when I don’t know what I’m doing?”I held on to her arm. “And stop your damn room from spinning already, will you?”

“You’ll feel better outside.”

That was the truth. The fresh air would feel wonderful. It didn’t take much more convincing to get me out there, but I was baffled when I saw where she was leading me. Dre’s truck.

And that was the last thing I remembered.

Shrieking banshees were outside my window.You just had to be Dorothy, didn’t you?My house had been transported to Ireland during the night. Great. Now I’d have to deal with the fucking flying monkeys. Wait, no. That was Oz. So what kind of monkeys hung out with banshees? This could not be good.

“Perry!”

Huh? I rolled my head over shards of glass. They were piercing my skin, my eyeballs, my bones. I was probably making a huge mess.

“Perry!” My lids lifted, barely. “Perry, answer your damn phone already!”

I groaned. Not a banshee. Christa. And the shrieking was coming from down the hall, not outside. Knowing that didn’t help in the least. I still needed it to stop. Badly.

“I can’t,” I tried yelling back, but it hurt too much. It came out more like a whisper.

I closed my eyes, and the next time I opened them it was afternoon. My phone came into focus, lying on the bed. Unless it had sprouted legs and hopped up, I could only assume Christa brought it in while I was out cold.

I pulled it towards me. My brain was still bashing my skull, butthankfully it had improved to the point where I no longer wanted to weep. On the screen there were notifications of missed calls from my mom and sister and one text from an unknown number. Nothing from Dre.

I checked out the text:How are you feeling?

Yeah, I’d be answering that one with anI’m feeling hot and horny, and by the way, I’m also not wearing any panties.I would’ve rolled my eyes if I could’ve done it pain-free.

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