Page 84 of Love, Luck & Clusterf*ck

“I’m just having an off day, that’s all.”

By his frown, he didn’t buy it. “What were you apologizing for?”

Was it possible that he didn’t know? But how? Since there hadn’t been a Wengo’s wet T-shirt contest going on, he would’ve come back and wondered what happened. All she had to do was describe the crazy bitch who’d doused her with her own drink, and he would’ve connected the dots. I was wearing frickin’ pink too. Combined with my physical features, how was that for a dead giveaway? Yet he acted like he truly didn’t know. It made no sense.

“I’m apologizing for not being myself right now,” I said softly. I pleaded with my tears not to make an appearance. Then I threatened them for good measure. “But I will be soon. Honest.”

“Perry….”

His tone, it was too thoughtful. I couldn’t take it. “I really need to get back now, Stephen.”

I left before he responded. When I plopped down at my station, Kate said, “Your cell’s been going nuts.”

I grabbed it off the table and read the first text from an unknown number.

Please don’t do this, baby. Let me see you, talk to you, anything.Just don’t shut me out. One more chance. That’s all I’m asking.

Oh, that’s all? Well, in that case… eat shit and choke on it, motherfucker.And what number was he calling from? Dammit. I powered it off yet again.

My work line rang. “FiTech, Perry speaking.”

“Perry, please don’t hang—”

Click. Oh hell no. He was not going to start messing with me at work. I never wished so badly that he was my boss so I could whip out that policy and yell harassment.

I turned on my phone long enough to shoot off a quick text.

Do not call me at work again. Do not text or call my cell again. Do not force me to get a new number. You brought this on yourself, so do not ask me for anything ever again.

After I hit Send, I turned it off in case he couldn’t follow simple directions. Then I rapped on Stephen’s door.

“You’re right, I’m not feeling too great. Can I still leave early?”

I came into work the following day not feeling much better than the day before. Possibly even worse. After I’d left early, I went to the Domes and sat there for another couple hours, switching between the desert and rain forest. Then I’d gone back to Sam’s, played with Emily a while, and turned in before the sun went down. I’d been completely restless, spending way too much energy thinking about Christa and how a person could be so cruel to someone they’re supposed to care about. I had to get it together. She wasn’t worth another sleepless night.

I’d been one of the first to arrive that morning. Stephen was already there but on a call with his head lowered. Kate and Alexwere nowhere in sight yet. I plunked my purse down underneath the table and got ready for a new day. This one would be better; I’d make sure of it. I reached around to fire up my computer when I noticed something pink and lumpy propped up against it. I pulled it out and… jelly beans?

Upon closer inspection, it wasn’t just jelly beans, but a bag of cotton candy Jelly Bellies with a note that read:

If a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down, a hundred spoonfuls should be able to knock out anything that ails you.

Stephen

I started laughing. Then I popped a handful. Ilovedthis flavor. I tucked them safely into my purse, then turned around. He was watching me.

I still had a few minutes, so I went to say thank you. It wasn’t until I was in his office when it really hit me. My “thank you” sounded more like “blub, blub, sob, wail, gaargh.”

He was immediately near me, touching my arm. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

I wiped my eyes. “That was just so considerate of you, Stephen. Thank you.”

He blew out a loud exhale. “Jesus, Perry. They’re only jelly beans. You were scaring me for a second there.”

I managed a smile. “Sorry. But that was probably one of the best gifts I’ve ever received. I guess I got a little emotional.”

Now he was really looking at me strangely. I couldn’t explain much more than that. I couldn’t explain why it had hit me so hard. I couldn’t explain that hegotme.

“I, um, just really like sugar.” I laughed. “I didn’t ask for the sweet tooth of a five-year-old, but hey, we gotta play what we’re dealt, right?”

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