“A place for us to stretch out and relax. It’s better than the seats.”
She nodded, then crawled in. I did the same, keeping my distance as well. But what I wouldn’t give to pull her next to me and lay her against my chest.
“You weren’t kidding,” she said. “The skies are so clear.” She propped herself up a bit. “Um, I don’t have to worry about a turkey hopping in with us, right?”
I laughed. “No, you’re safe.”
You’re always safe with me.
It felt like we were in our own little corner of the world, free from outsiders. I could hear voices behind us, but they weren’t close enough to decipher the words. They were easy to ignore. If only it were as easy to ignore that she wasn’t mine.
I’d been trying so hard not to fuck up her life, but what if I was doing that very thing just by being in it? And what if I was doing the same to myself? This situation we were in couldn’t be good for either of us in the long term. I never expected that night I’d called truce to develop into something that left me needing much more.
“Perry?” I started to think she’d fallen asleep.
“Mmhmm.”
“If I was making you uncomfortable, you’d tell me, right? I never want you to feel like I’m acting inappropriately or doing something that feels wrong to you.”
“Of course I’d tell you. You’re a good friend, Stephen.”
She took my hand and squeezed, and I felt the jolt both physically and emotionally. How could I have ever thought that what I felt for her wasn’t sexual? It was highly sexual. It just wasn’tonlysexual.
She dropped it just as quickly. The greater part of me was relieved. I didn’t think I had enough willpower left to resist any more contact.
I was a good friend.
I was so screwed.
Was it my imagination or was Stephen more distant lately? I scrolled through ten days’ worth of texts since the bonfire at Jillian’s and came up flat. They seemed normal enough, maybe a bit reserved, but maybe I was just whacked in the head too.
I bounced on my bed—or rather the bed I was borrowing from my sister—and realized I could either sit there and dissect it until my brain split open or I could choose to ignore it and focus on something else. I pushed on my abdomen. It was heavy and crampy, and I wished my damn period would just get here already because I was aggravated as hell.
That was it. That had to be the problem. I stood up and bounced around the room instead. I was just out of sorts and not thinking clearly. I needed to take a walk or something. It was a warm early Sunday evening, and I’d been cooped up in the house all day analyzing Stephen’s actions and eating jelly beans. It was time to get my life back. It’d been long enough.
I stepped out into the hallway. Emily was still napping, Sam was probably either cooking or cleaning something, and Paul was tinkering with crap in the garage. I left out the back door, hoping to avoid seeing him, when I heard a familiar voice.
Christa?What business does she have here?I walked towards the garage. Since I’d blocked her, she hadn’t bothered me. Unlike Dre, she hadn’t tried sneaking through a different number.
“Get away from me, you fucking perv.”
I couldn’t hear Paul’s response, but I poked my head around to see Christa pushing him away.
“What the hell’s going on?”
“You’ve got a visitor,” Paul said, digging through his toolbox.
“That creep tried putting his hands on me.”
Paul chuckled. “Get over yourself, girl. I was just talking.”
“Fuck if you were.” Christa waved her hands around. “I came up, asking if Perry was here, and you took that opportunity to move in on me.”
He tossed aside his rag. “You got a screw loose, you know that?” He went into the house, shaking his head.
Christa shivered. “Now I have to spray myself with Lysol. Can you believe that asshole? Yeah, of course, you can. You know what a sleaze he is. I’ve never had him try and touch me before, though. He said he was just talking. Ha. He’s the fucking demented one.”
“What are you doing here?” I said calmly. I’d been doing well—well enough—and I didn’t want to undo that by seeing her face. Although, too late for that.