Page 113 of Love, Luck & Clusterf*ck

Stephen came into the kitchen with a big smile on his face. The moment I saw him, my heart slid out of my chest and splattered to the ground. Ilovedhim. This was going to be way harder than I thought.

He set a container on the counter. “Frank’s ravioli. Hope you’re hungry. I stopped by after work and helped them install their new dryer. Mom insisted I send food home for you.”

“Oh… that was… nice.” Words were sticking in my throat. Once I moved out, there’d be no reason for him not to entertain. Hell, why sugarcoat it? He could bring women back and fuck them whenever and however he wished. The sickening jealousy came back with a vengeance, and I wanted to stick my finger down my throat to purge it all out.

“Something wrong?”

“I have some news.”

He looked at me with concern, just like he always did when something was off with me. He was a good friend. The fucking best.

“Nothing bad. I found a place today. It’s within my budget, which of course means it’s tiny. Even tinier than yours,” I said, faking a smile. “But it’s safe and… I can move in immediately.”

Please, please let that be disappointment covering his face. No. What the hell was wrong with me? I didn’t want him unhappy.

“Where is it?”

“Over on Archer across from that daycare center. It’s in a decent area and not too far from work.”

He nodded, turning away and going to the sink. “And you’re happy enough with it? I already told you you’re free to stay however long you need. I don’t want you to just pick the first place you can afford.”

“I know. You’ve been so generous, and God, do I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. But I really do like it, and who knows when I’ll find something that close to perfect again.”

“Okay.” He turned on the sink, and I wondered what he was doing over there; there weren’t any dishes to wash. He shut it off and went to the fridge, pulling out a beer. “Well, as long as you’re happy.”

“I am.” Was I?

He turned around and smiled, but it appeared as genuine as mine. I knew he cherished our friendship as much as I did. That was never a question. And I also knew he meant it when he said I could stay as long as I wanted. He’d probably agree to forever; that’s the kind of man he was. But I loved him too much to keep making him put his life on hold, and I couldneverhandle seeing another woman in the house. I could barely handle talking to one over the phone.

“I know it’s Friday,” he said, “but what do you say we just stay in tonight and watch movies? Since it’s one of your last nights here and all, and we can go out anytime.” He opened the lid to the ravioli and waved it in front of my nose. It smelled amazing, as usual. “After you eat this, you probably won’t want to move much anyway.” He smiled again, better that time but still not crinkling his eyes.

God, I wanted that so badly. Every part of me was screaming to say yes, to do nothing else than spend the night with him and only him. But Stu.

“I’m sorry, Stephen. I already have plans tonight. I’m leaving soon.”

“What kind of plans?”

“I’m just meeting a friend.” Damn, this was hard. I had to go before I started crying. It felt like everything was ending. “I really should hurry up and get changed.”

“Yeah, you should.” He put the ravioli in the fridge and grabbed another beer, although he hadn’t finished his first.

I went to my room and changed into a nicer dress and slipped on some heels. Stu wanted to meet downtown at Club JoJo’s. I wasn’t in the mood to dance, but he had his heart set on making a whole night of it. Dinner conversation and then whooping it up on the dance floor.

I came downstairs to find Stephen on the couch. He barely glanced my way when he said, “You got a text.”

“Thanks.”

I went to the kitchen where I’d left my phone on the counter and checked the screen.

Change of plans, gorgeous. Meet me at Lucky’s instead? Can’t wait. xoxo.

I typed off a quickSounds goodand slipped it into my purse. More than good, actually. Lucky’s was definitely more my speed that night; although, I was probably a bit overdressed. As clingy as the dress was, at least it was super comfortable. No sense going back and changing. I walked back into the family room, and Stephen looked me dead on that time. In fact, he eyed me over thoroughly.

“I’ve never seen you wear anything so short and tight.” His voice was… I didn’t know. Eerie. A little angry, maybe? “Sure you want to go out like that? Might give someone the wrong idea.”

What, he’s my father now?I’d figured out his tone, and it was cold. It upset me, and that felt much better than the alternative. I didn’t want to feel bummed over going out, and he’d just given me reasonnot to. He had women calling and inviting him to hotel rooms, so what right did he have to question what I did or what I wore? It was insulting.

“See you later, Stephen.” No need to respond to the dress comment. Of course, I wanted to go out like this. I was wearing it, wasn’t I?

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