Page 64 of My Heart To Heal

Leaning back against my car, I hang my head; she’s never forgiving me.

Three weeks. I haveto hand it to her, she’s got staying power.

I knew she was mad at me.Iwas mad at me but living and working next door to each other and sharing the same friends, I thought she’d at least be able to say good morning to me in the hallway, but nope, nothing. She stays completely silent if we happen to be in the same place at the same time and doesn’t look at me — I’m not even there as far as she’s concerned.

I’ve tried. It’s embarrassing how much I’ve tried. I’ve said hello in the hallway. I’ve tried to talk to her in the diner, the general store, the bar, even at Doug’s house, but she just turns and walks the other way unless Jonah is with her. The kid’s feelings toward me haven’t changed, and fuck if that doesn’t feel good. He runs and hugs me if he sees me, which, I suspect, is why Missy seems to have been taking him out earlier in the morning and taking him out after school. She can’t avoid me when her kid acts like my best friend, so she just prevents us from seeing each other.

I thought if I went into the shop, she would talk to me if only to be professional in front of her customers, but I was wrong. She saw me approaching and turned the sign on the door to closed.

On the first morning of the fourth week of Missy hating my guts, I open my door to hear her grunt in frustration and bang her hand against hers.

‘Fuck,’ she hisses, and I freeze.

‘Miss, you okay?’ She ignores me and releases a sigh. ‘Missy,’

‘No, I’m not okay,’ she snaps, her voice dripping with disdain, but it’shervoice, and I’ve fucking missed that. ‘I locked myself out.’

There’s a tremble in her tone, and I take a tentative step closer as she turns and looks in my eyes, and my heart stops. She doesn’t look mad as her gaze finds mine — she looks hurt.

‘Where’s Jonah?’ I worry that he’s locked inside alone, but she shakes her head.

‘Not in there.’

I release a breath of relief. ‘Missy, let me help.’

‘No.’

‘Miss.’

‘No, I’ll call Doug.’

‘You know they’re out of town this week.’

‘Shit. Okay, well, I’ll call Buck then.’ She reaches back to the pocket of her jeans and closes her eyes. ‘Fuck.’

She doesn’t need to tell me she also locked her phone inside. I see that in her expression.

‘Missy, stop being so stubborn. I’m right here.’

She laughs, but it lacks any real amusement, and it cuts me. I miss all the times I’ve heard her laugh — made her laugh.

‘You are a piece of work.’ Her words are muttered, but I hear them loud and clear.

‘Look, you hate me. I get it, but I can help you. In fact, I think I have a spare key somewhere. Let me check.’

‘Excuse me?’

Oh, okay, now she looks mad.

‘Um.’RetreatNicholas, fall back.

‘You have a key to my apartment.’

‘Somewhere, yeah, I think so, from when it was empty. Unless you changed the locks.’

‘Are you kidding me right now?’ She glares, and my hackles rise. What does she think I’ve been doing with it?

‘I haven’t used it.Jesus, it was just while the place was empty in case of emergency. I’m not even sure I know where it is.’ She laughs that humorless laugh again, and fuck it, now I’m mad. ‘Do you think I’msneaking into your place and sniffing your panties or something? Fuck, Miss, you know me better than that.’

---