Page 46 of Smoke

“I learned from the best.”

He laughed. “It’s not my fault you were so easy to manipulate. I guess missing your dead baby daddy worked out in my favor.”

I wanted to punch him dead in his shit… spit on him. He made me want to be violent when I wasn’t a violent person. I’d given this man nothing but love, and he stayed around until hecould finally get what he wanted from me, even if it meant he had to take it. I couldn’t pretend that my heart wasn’t hurting because I never expected to be here. Now it was looking like I wasn’t getting out of this spot any time soon.

Hours went by before they finally finished cutting, weighing, and bagging everything up. My body was sore from sitting in that chair so long. I was hungry. My bladder was about to burst, and I just wanted to leave.

Patrick moved the shelf and unlocked the secret door before putting everything inside. We left the basement then finally made our way out of the building. As I opened my car door, Patrick closed it. Yanking me around, he turned me to face him. He towered over me with dark angry eyes. I tried to look away from him, but he grabbed my face, holding it roughly between his fingers.

“If I come back to get my shit and it’s gone, you’ll be sorry, and I promise you that. You don’t want that, Romi. Understood?”

I nodded.

“Use your fucking words.”

“I understand.”

“Glad we’re on the same page.” He leaned in and placed a rough kiss to my lips. “Good night, baby.”

He mushed me as he stepped back. I fought back yet another set of tears as I climbed into my car. I was only able to hold it together until they pulled out of the parking lot. The minute I saw taillights, I broke down. My audible cries filled the car as I beat my fists against the steering wheel.

Something had to fucking give.

It took me an additional twenty minutes to calm down enough to be able to drive. When I pulled out of the parking lot, I knew I wasn’t going home. I needed to be somewhere where I felt loved because all I felt right now was hatred.

It was nearing eleven, and I knew my parents would be getting ready for bed, but I still made my way to their home. When I got there, the lights downstairs were off, but I could see the glow from their bedroom window. Climbing out of the car, I headed up the driveway, to the front steps, and let myself in.

I kicked off my shoes and took the stairs to the second floor. After covering the side of my face where Patrick had slapped me with my hair, I lightly tapped on my parents’ bedroom door before opening it.

“Hey, Mommy, Daddy,” I said, sticking my head in.

My mother looked up from her crossword book. “Hey, baby. What are you doing here?”

“I just really wanted to be near Korri tonight. I’m sorry I missed dinner.”

She smiled. “It’s okay, baby. You feeling better?”

“Yes, ma’am. I’m not gonna hold you. I just wanted to let you know I was here. I love you both. Good night.”

“Good night.”

Closing their door, I headed down the hall to my childhood bedroom. Gently, I pushed the door open. The room was slightly illuminated from the night-light because my baby was afraid of the dark. Korri was sound asleep, cuddled up with her big ass teddy bear. I tipped into the room and used the flashlight on my phone to find something to sleep in. I usually kept a few things here just in case we stayed over. Once I found a pair of shorts and a top, I went into the bathroom to relieve my bladder and take a shower.

The temperature was just right to soothe my aching joints. I stood under the water, wishing it could cleanse me of my troubles. Tears streamed down my face, only to be masked by the steady flow of water. I felt like this was exactly how I walked around in the world these days.

Troubled. Afraid. Defeated… all hidden behind a smile because I had to be strong. I was tired of being strong… just fucking tired.

With a heavy sigh, I grabbed the loofah and commenced to cleaning myself. Twenty minutes later, I was out. I brushed my teeth and pulled my hair into a ponytail before leaving the bathroom. Carefully, I climbed into bed with my baby. Snuggled under the covers, I stared lovingly at her. She was my entire world, my reason to go as hard as I did. She wasn’t planned, but she was my biggest blessing.

Leaning over, I kissed her forehead, causing her to stir slightly. Her eyes fluttered open, and she looked up at me.

“Mommy!”

She inched closer to me and wrapped her arms around me as much as she could.

“Hey, my pretty girl. I’m sorry I missed dinner with you.”

“It’s okay. Auntie Nay said you weren’t feeling well. Do you feel better now?”

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