Page 71 of Replay

How am I supposed to do this? All because two selfish people ruined everything.

I re-read the middle part again, digesting what this entry is referring to. He pictured me when he was with someone else. I don’t know whether to be flattered or sick.

“Berkley, let me explain.” Nate’s voice is suddenly right behind me.

I turn toward him as he sets the food down on his nightstand, rushing over to me as I process what I just read.

“May 7th… Was that your first time after…” I swallow the lump in my throat. “After us?”

He gently rubs the back of his knuckle down my cheek and nods. “First and only.”

My eyebrows pinch as I try to process what he’s saying. “Like first and only with her?”.

With his eyes on mine, he shakes his head. “No, BB.”

Realization hits me. “How? Why?”

“After that night, I knew I was nowhere near ready to move on. It wasn’t worth it.”

“Because you had to think of me?” I find myself inching closer to him, desperately holding on to every word.

He nods, but the concern hasn’t left his face. “Does that upset you?”

I bite my lip. “I don’t know… In some really fucked up way, I think I like it.”

It's hard not to touch him with how he watches me. I can also admit to myself that while reading that was hard, the woman inside of me who’s absolutely feral for Nathan Outlaw loves that he couldn’t get off without thinking of me.

Reaching between him, I tug the waistband of his pants, bringing him flush against me. His hands find my hips as I speak. “I know how sexual of a man you are, Nate. What have you been doing the past two years?”

His hazel eyes turn almost black like they were at the club. “Fucking my hand and thinking of you. Hence why I came in my damn pants tonight.” Nate moves his right hand around me, gripping my ass. “I’m not exaggerating when I say I was seconds from coming when you were rubbing your ass all over me, but the minute my finger slid into your pussy, I knew there was no controlling it.”

I moan, and we both move simultaneously. In the next breath, our lips are colliding. I almost forgot what this was like. Tongues tangling, teeth clashing, skin nipping…an all-consuming kiss.

The type of kiss that only has one way of ending.

He walks us backwards, and we crash down onto his bed, only taking a breath before our lips are searing together again. I straddle him just like I was at the club, my dress riding up overmy hips. With my bare pussy grinding into his already hard cock, we both groan into each other's mouths.

Nate looks down between us, and I feel his cock throb against me at the sight.

“What did you do with your thong, needy girl?”

I roll my hips across his hard dick and moan.

“I knew I wouldn’t need them for long.” Leaning down, I bite his lip. “Plus, they were drenched from earlier.”

“I want to see all of you.” He leans up, tugging my dress over my head. My breasts bounce free, and if I could bottle up this feeling, I would. He watches me with both familiarity and a renewed appreciation. I’ve never felt sexier in my life, from just the appreciation on his face.

“You are so beautiful.” He closes his eyes for a brief second, like he’s committing it to memory.

Shaking his head, this time when he speaks, his voice is full of emotion. “To think I almost lost the privilege of ever seeing this again.”

I gently kiss his lips. “Hey, don’t do that. Stay with me in this moment.”

He runs his thumb over my hip bone. “I’m here, BB. I’m here.”

We kiss desperately again, until his fingers move between us, finding my wet center.

“Fuck. I didn’t think you could get any more soaked than you were earlier.”

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