Page 94 of Replay

“I'm glad he was there…he’s a good guy with a big heart,” she says, and her fingers lace with mine.

“Yeah, a heart that better stay far away from my baby sister unless he’s serious…”

She nudges me in the shoulder. “Ourbaby sister.”

“Fuck, that sounds so weird.” I push out a breath, and she smiles softly, nodding in agreement.

Twenty-Four

Brian

There are things in life that nothing can prepare you for, and things you know will forever change you.

From the moment I heard Willow’s shaky voice over the phone, I knew whatever she was going to say was going to devastate me. Then she confirmed my biggest fear since learning about Jane’s indiscretions over the years.

Willow is not my biological daughter.

As I stand, looking out my front window, I await a conversation no parent ever plans to have with their children. But unfortunately for me, my life’s path was never fully in my hands. I was married to a selfish, unworthy woman, who didn’t care about the impact of her actions, nor her words.

I spoke with Jane briefly after Willow left earlier today. Not only to confirm the news, but to chastise her for what she did to our daughter. For the further damage she’s caused in their lives. In what world would a grown woman unleash that type of news on their child without a proper discussion?

When I hear the rumble of an engine approach, I brace myself. Because now I know the truth…and the kids deserve to know the whole story, from the beginning. Nate gave me a heads-up that it wasn’t just him and Willow coming here, that Berkley and his teammate Nola will be joining them too.

I'm down the front stairs and wrapping my arms around my kids as soon as they’re out of the car. Unable to stop the tears from welling in my eyes at the sight of them. They’re strong, and resilient, but still, no one should have to bear that news alone.

Berkley stands off to the side, where I see her staring off in the distance in order to give me time with Nate and Will. With a wave of my hand, I motion for her to come into the hug. There’s no doubt in my mind she’s feeling just as much betrayal as my two. I look around for their friend Nola as well, who’s still in the driver’s seat of the car.“Come on, let’s get inside,” I suggest, waving for Nola to join us.

Once we’re gathered in the living room, Nola excuses himself to the back deck. I make a mental note to thank him later for being there for my kids on a day like today.

“Did you speak with her?” Willow asks.

I nod, but I’m unable to speak the words. The confirmation that the poison her mom spewed to her earlier is a hundred percent true.

Nate looks at me, concern etched on his face, and it hurts my heart that my children are suffering.

My voice cracks as I speak, “It—it doesn’t change a thing for me, Willow bug. You’re still my baby girl. Always have been, always will be.”

As my eyes flit between both my children, my hand reaches for theirs where they sit across from me. Gently squeezing once, reassuring them that we’re in this together.

“Did you ever suspect…?” Nate asks. I notice Willow’s eyes don’t meet mine with the question. Almost as if she can't stand to look at me while I answer.

“She always looked like her mother, but then I met Berkley…” I remember that day so vividly. We were about to have lunch, and Nate had mentioned his new girlfriend was coming over before they went to the beach. He was so excited for us to meet her. Lovesick from day one. I could tell… I was the same once.

“It’s their eyes…such a clear blue. One you don’t see very often. At this point, I had known about Jane’s affairs, so I did feel a bit of paranoia, but despite the similarity, I brushed it off as a pure coincidence. Again, because it didn’t matter.” I try to reiterate that fact as many times as possible. “Your mom and I at that time had been in counseling for over five years. We started right after I found out about the affairs.” I situate myself in my seat, getting comfortable before I tell them the full truth of our relationship.

“When I first met your mother, she had recently had her heart broken. We took it slow, and eventually, our friendship grew into something more, and we got pregnant with you, Nate. Then soon after, we got married. Of course, just like every relationship, we had our ups and downs, but we were happy together. A few years later, we found out we were pregnant with you, Willow. I was so ecstatic to finally have a little baby girl. No offense, ol’ buddy,” I say with a lighthearted chuckle. I love my boy ferociously, but I always dreamt of being a girl dad.

I take a deep, steady breath and continue as all three sets of eyes remain focused on me. “It was around the time of your seventhbirthday that I found out about your mom’s relationship with Wade. It was later brought to my attention that Berkley’s father was the man who had originally broken her heart. She swore it was over between the two of them, that he was moving away, and it was a slip-up never to be repeated.”

Berkley’s eyes go wide with realization. "I had overheard my aunt discussing this but had no clue who it was about until Nate told me the truth."

I nod my head slightly. “Your mom had found out about the relationship, and they moved to Raleigh to try to repair their marriage. I didn’t even know you guys had moved back until Nate mentioned your last name one day, and I put it all together.” Not wanting to further upset Berkley, I don’t go into details about her mother being the one who came to me about their infidelity a few days after Willow’s seventh birthday. She made me aware of the first affair that had apparently happened eight years prior and apologized for not letting me know sooner. She never mentioned anything about Willow being Wade’s, but I think that was the first time I considered it because of the timeline. Even though I chose to ignore the thought, likely not wanting to know the truth, because no matter what, she’s my daughter.

“You never questioned if you were my father after finding out about the affair,” Willow interjects.

“After the secrets came out, the thought briefly crossed my mind, but I was so naïve and in love with your mom and the family we had built; it was almost like I didn’t want to know. I’m sorry, maybe that wasn’t the right way to handle things.”

“Daddy, none of this is your fault,” Willow says, and her tone reminds me of the sweet little girl who used to run through the halls.

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