Page 108 of The Roads We Follow

“You may not believe this, and I suppose I’ve given you little reason to,” Adele says in a voice that hardly sounds like her own, “but I’ve never envied you more than I do right now. And I’ve envied your life for decades.” She meets my stunned gaze. “I’ve resented your freedom as the youngest child, as well as the differences in our responsibilities to the family. Perhaps that’s why I felt justified in pushing you as hard as I did once you moved back home.” She swallows and rubs her lips together as if uncertain where to go next. “That separation you speak of, between family life and work life, that’s felt like a fantasy to me since Daddy gave me a desk at the label.” When her voice trembles, she clears her throat. “I thought it might finally be possible when this investor opened negotiations with us, but I never counted on it. Not in the same way Michael and Mama did.”

Guilt presses down on me at the repercussions my actions have had on our family. “Adele, I’m—”

“No, listen.” She cuts me off. “I’m not saying you weren’t wrong for keeping the book a secret, but I was equally as wrong for how I handled it. I took my stress and disappointment out on you last night, the same way I’ve been doing since Peter showed his true colors.” She hesitates. “I’m sorry. It’s something I need to change. My cardiologist has made that plenty clear.”

“Your cardiologist?” Hattie’s distress over the word mirrors my own.

Adele blows out a deep exhale and then stretches her neck side to side. “Michael’s the only one who knows this, mostly because I couldn’t risk it getting out during our search for an investor, but also because he was the one to drive me to the hospital after I collapsed in our home office. The doctors ruled the episode as a minor heart attack, but I’m at risk for another one if I don’t make some changes.”

“Adele!” Hattie slaps a hand to her mouth, her eyes filled with horror. “When was this?”

“Shortly after Peter won the lawsuit and we were losing artists left and right. I was up almost every night, crunching numbers and trying to figure out a way to save the label from bankruptcy for a second time. Michael’s been on me to step down, constantly telling me to think of Cheyenne and Mama and you girls—and I do! But Daddy trustedmeto manage his legacy. I don’t want to fail him.” She swallows whatever emotion is trying to rise. “So I’ve added natural supplements, prepackaged, nutrient-dense meals, and a watch with a step tracker, hoping it will be enough to offset the burden until we find the right partner.Ifwe find them.”

“And Mama doesn’t know?”

Adele nods gravely. “She knows I’m concerned about my blood pressure—but I haven’t told her why. Not after what happened to Daddy.”

Icy fingers of fear walk my spine. I desperately wish I could offer her a solution, but before I can even ask her another question about the investor, Hattie starts crying. At first, it’s a few tears, and then it’s an onslaught.

Adele and I look from her to each other.

“Hattie, I see my cardiologist every other month, you don’t—”

“No.” She sobs before she buries her face in her hands. “That’s not ... why I’m ... upset.”

“Okay,” Adele says, patting her on the shoulder awkwardly.

“I’m the author!” she wails. “The one working with the ghostwriter. It’s not Peter, it’s me.” She slaps a hand to her chest. “I’m the reason the partnership is at risk, Adele, not Raegan. She didn’t know.”

The sun seems to make a full revolution around the earth with how long it takes me to comprehend what she’s saying.Hattie’s the anonymous author of the tell-all?

“But why? Why would you ever agree to write something like that?”

“Because I can’t lose my kids!” She swipes under her eyes with the hem of her cotton shirt. “After Peter won the wrongful termination case, he threatened to take my kids away from me permanently. Hesaid he has all sorts of ammunition he can use against me when the time is right, including my struggle with depression. I was scared—I’m still scared.” The tears come again. “He left me with the mountain of debt he was incurring long before his affair came out.” She wipes her face on her sleeve. “I have nothing to my name outside of what’s left in my trust from Mama, and most of that is what I used to buy Peter out of half of every asset we owned together. I’ve sold jewelry, clothing, shoes, furniture, designer luggage. I even mortgaged the house three months ago to pay down the lines of credit he took out before he filed for divorce.”

“Oh, Hattie,” I say as a sudden memory of her declined credit card that night in Tulsa surfaces to mind. “I had no idea things were so bad.”

She blows out a shaky breath. “Peter’s story was everywhere, and for a long time I took Adele’s advice and ignored the reporters. But not long after he threatened to fight me for full custody of the kids, an editor from Willow House emailed. She convinced me to call her back and take advantage of this rare opportunity to piggyback on Mama’s recent resurgence in the spotlight. The advance they offered more than covered what I needed for a retainer to secure a new team of divorce lawyers who specialized in custody cases. After they agreed to take my case, I agreed to the book deal. The editor assured me it would be easy since I would just be recounting the memories and stories Mama always told us to a ghostwriter. She told me she’d just need a few exclusive details and a few family secrets—true or not—in order to get the book to sell. I never imagined they would spin it as a tell-all or how much they’d hound me for more and more personal information. At one point they told me I didn’t have enough content to fill the word count we negotiated, and if I didn’t provide them with more, I would be in breach of contract. That’s when I told them the stories Peter told me about the history Daddy had once confided in him about the label—both with Farrow Music and TriplePlay.”

Her confession hovers like a cloud above us, and neither Adele nor I speak for several seconds. Adele turns and paces in the gravel silently. It’s clear she’s struggling. I am, too.

“Why didn’t you tell us Peter was threatening to take the kids?” I ask.

“Because I knew what he’d already cost the label. I couldn’t go back to Adele and ask for more money when I knew the only reason we were in this mess was because I pushed Daddy to hire him in the first place.” Hattie waits for Adele to turn and face her. “You were right about him from the start, and I didn’t listen. You were always the one getting special attention for being smart and wise and savvy while I’ve been the one causing problems. For once, I wanted to feel chosen. Peter made me feel that way ... at least, he did at first.” Her face is pained, and she sucks in a breath. “I’m so sorry. I tried to get out of this contract—I called Willow House as soon as we left the Redwoods that day and told her I wanted out of the deal, and that I’d find a way to repay the advance even if I have to make payments for the next five years. But she said it’s binding. No matter what move I make, the people I love suffer for it.”

“Oh, Hattie.” Adele’s voice trembles, her expression chastened. “Do you really believe I hold you accountable for Peter’s transgressions against us?”

My sister doesn’t look up as she answers. “I don’t know why you wouldn’t.”

I watch Adele’s face crumple at that, her eyes glassy and her voice broken. “Then I’m an even bigger failure than I realized. I don’t blame you, Hattie. And I’m sorry if I’ve made you believe otherwise.” It’s several seconds before she can compose herself long enough to speak again. “I’d cash out every asset I own before I’d let Peter take your kids away from you.”

“Me too,” I say. “You’re not alone in this, Hattie. You have us and you have Mama.”

I wrap my arms around Hattie at the same time Adele moves in. When her arms enfold over top of mine, I openly cry at the realization that this is the first sisterly embrace I can remember since the three of us stood at our Daddy’s graveside. And with everything in me, I hope that what started here on this road will be the first chapter of a new story together.

31

Micah

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