Page 58 of Fall Apart

“No,” I say, holding my arm steady as she pushes against it. “You’re not running away from me again. Not like at Roxy’s. Tonight, we’re going to talk this out. I’ll start: I’m sorry.”

She grunts in frustration before turning to look at me, the fire in her eyes softening to a dull glow before she rolls them. “For what?”

“I’m sorry I said you’re overreacting. I’m sorry I questioned how you feel. You’re right, only you truly know that.” I meet her gaze, wishing for some better way to put her at ease. “But I meant it. I will never be that person. It hurts when you’ve thought I could do that to someone more than once now.”

Her shoulders sag and she sighs, looking back outside for a moment. I stand firm, my arm still outstretched, watching the way the light dances in her eyes.

“I saw you two. That looked-” she frowns and her nose scrunches, “intimate. Like more than friends.”

I sigh and step towards her, noticing that she doesn’t back away from me. “I don’t know what else to say. Kayleigh and I are friends. She’s had a rough few days. That’s all.”

She turns toward me, cocking one hip out, and folding her arms across her chest. She gnaws on her lip, pulling my eyes down to them. “I’m never going to let what happened with my ex happen to me again. I don’t want to feel like you’re hiding something from me.”

I reach out, grabbing her by the hips, holding her firmly in front of me. I look into her eyes, my heart warming when she looks right back into mine, searching for reassurance. “I’m not hiding anything. In fact, she knows all about us.”

She quirks an eyebrow at me. “She knows aboutus?”

I huff a laugh. “Yeah, I told her after that first night at Roxy’s. There isn’t much we don’t share. For the record, she really likes you.”

She gnaws on her lip again, her eyes looking away before she nods. “Okay.”

“Okay?” Her eyes meet mine again.

“Yes.” I take a chance, pulling her in for a hug. She nuzzles into my chest, letting me finally exhale the breath I’ve been holding since I got here. “How’d you two get so close?”

I rub her back before turning her towards the view of the mogul course. “That’s where I tore my right knee, on that course.” She pulls away just enough to look up at me. I look away, back out towards the mountain. I hate reliving those days, but with her, it’s almost like they don’t even matter, like they’re truly in the past. “She was there. She was competing on the giant slalom course, but had time to watch. This was long after our high schooldates. By then, we knew we didn’t like each other like that.”

“Romantically incompatible?” I look back down at her, holding her closely, nodding.

“Yeah, exactly. But we still had so much in common. She was going through some things at home, in her life, at the same time. After my surgery, she spent the little free time she had outside of school and training with me. She helped me with my rehab routines.” I swallow hard, not wanting to go much further. As relaxed as she makes me feel, I know there’s so much here, so much pain, things that aren’t my story to tell. “And that’s right around the time when Mom’s car accident happened.”

Her eyes meet mine with that look, the one that makes me feel safe. The one that isn’t pity, just understanding. She rubs her cheek into my chest and I rest my chin on top of her head. “What’d you tell her about us?”

A laugh rumbles up in my chest as my stomach finally calms down, knowing that she’s not going to run off on me again. “That you drive me crazy. That you push my buttons.” I feel her try to pull out of my hug.

“Not a good start, Chapman.”

I squeeze her tight. “And that you make me feel better about myself than I have in ages. That you make me feel seen. That you’re the only person I’ve wanted to seriously date and you’re the only person in my life.”

“Clay,” she says, her voice hesitant, “I don’t know if I’m ready for something serious yet. I can’t tell you what I can give you right now, where this can go.” She turns, her sapphire eyes meeting mine with a soft smile. “But I like you, a lot. I want you to be the only person in my life too. I know that much.”

“I can live with that.” Her words feel like a weight lifted off my chest.

“No secrets, no hiding?”

“No secrets, no hiding and no more running,” I say. “Promise. Now stay still for a second.”

She looks confused, but stands there and humors me while I open my phone to the settings and security page. I hold my phone between us, letting the camera take her picture, programming her in.

Her eyes look down at the phone and then back at me, still confused.

“There. I’m not going to hide anything from you. I mean it. You want to use my phone, look at it, whatever. It’s there for you now. But I’ll tell you, it’s pretty boring except for my kindle app.”

She looks back down at my phone and then me, now with an understanding expression. “Thank you.” She gets up on her toes to kiss me. “Now can we go back to your place?” She smirks back up at me and I feel more at ease.

“Let’s go home, princess.”

CHAPTER 27

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