Page 72 of Fall Apart

She gives me a questioning look. “Um, what?”

“Do you want to talk about your dad calling and why you spiraled?” I cross my arms and lean against the door, raising my eyebrows. “You called it an early day on the slopes and went a little wild with my sister. Any other day, I’d just say that’s you being you, but you seemed off.”

She reaches her hand out and takes mine, her eyes pleading.

“Can we talk about it in bed?”

I look back down the stairs from the loft to the main living area. “Everyone else is still out. I should stay out here so I’m on the sofa when they get back.”

She pats me twice on my cheek. “Relax. Not a single one of them has come up to the loft at night. No one’s going to notice.” Shepulls my hand and leads me into her room. I shut the door behind us and follow her to bed.

I strip down to my boxers and get under the covers. My eyes follow every movement as she walks to the dresser and peels off her jeans and sweater before changing into her pajamas. I could watch this every night for the rest of my life and never get tired of it.

She climbs into her side of the bed. I drape the covers over her, pulling her in to be my little spoon.

I reach behind me to turn off the light on the nightstand. She sighs and her head slumps into the pillow.

I run my palm over her hair, stroking it and tucking the loose strands of her ponytail behind her ear. It’s soothing me as much as it is her. With her body pressed against mine and my arm wrapped around her, I can feel her chest rise and fall with each breath.

“Whenever he calls, whenever we do talk, it just feels like it’s never about me.” Her voice is a shell of itself, not the normal fierce, defiant one that drives me wild. I keep stroking her hair and holding her tight.

“It feels like I’ve never been enough for him. No matter how hard I try, it’s not enough. I’m not enough.”

I run the backs of my fingers over the pulse point on her neck and she reaches up to grab my hand, holding it there. “I know it’s not the same, but I’ll tell you every time I can. You’re more than enough. You’re so, so much more than enough.”

“Am I being childish for wanting more from him?”

I huff a laugh. “Sorry, I know it’s not funny. But it’s far from childish.” I sigh. “But if it bothers you that much, have you ever talked to him about it? Told him how he makes you feel?”

She rolls over and looks at me, confusion lacing her expression.

“Because if there’s one thing I’ve never seen you be afraid of, it’s challenging someone. You challenge me, you call me out on my shit. You don’t put up with BS at work. You don’t let people talk down to you.”

She hums thoughtfully before resting her head on my shoulder. “I might just do that someday. I don’t know when, but someday.”

“Good, because from everything you’ve ever told me about him, it sounds like he does love you. He sent you to private prep school, he sent you to a damn good college, he took you traveling, and taught you to ski. To me those sound like things someone who loves you would do.”

I bite my tongue, holding back what my heart wants me to pour out.

“Maybe he’s just bad at actually saying how he really feels. Maybe he’s not much for talking, like me.”

She tilts her head up, looking up at me, her eyes a sky blue in this dim light. “There’s no one like you. You’re one of a kind.” She kisses my chest and I feel her eyes flutter shut as she breathes against my skin.

For the second night in a row, I watch her fall asleep in my arms, exactly where I want her.

And for the first night in my life, I fall asleepknowingthat I’m in love.

CHAPTER 32

LIZZY

SURF’S UP

“Come on. Get up.”I straddle Clay and pat him on the cheek, watching his eyes slowly open.

Clay looks at me with a bewildered expression and looks around the room. “Shit, did I sleep in?”

He tries to get up but I push him back down in bed with both hands against his firm pecs.

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