Page 79 of Fall Apart

I shrug. “I honestly don’t know yet.” Part of me is aching to. I don’t know the last time I felt so completely happy and at peace. I want nothing more than to share this with my best friend. And I want him to be able to share this with his brother. Part of me is still scared to open my blissful little bubble to everyone else and bring in the expectations that come with a relationship. I take in his soft smile,seeing no worry or hesitation there. “I still need a minute. But soon. Ok? We’ll know when it’s the right time.”

He nods. “Whatever you need, princess.” He turns and leaves the room, leaving me watching the man of my dreams walk out. The man that minutes ago told me he would wait his whole life for me to feel the same way as him. In this moment, I know it will be sooner than either of us think.

I wakeup the next morning, a mix of blissed out from another night with Clay and groggy knowing that I need to get up and stick to Veronica’s first chair schedule. Clay’s already gone for his run and I check my phone. There’s a message waiting from him.

Grumpy Roommate: Out early. I’ll see you later today, princess.

Me: Can’t wait.

I add the emoji for good measure. For some reason, waking up already knowing he was thinking about me makes my stomach flutter. I pry myself out of the comfy bed, and get dressed in all my base layers for the day of skiing. I head downstairs to meet everyone else for breakfast.

They’re already around the dining room table with TJ. There’s a plate ready for me, I’m sure courtesy of V. I sit down next to Grace who gives me a knowing smirk after nearly catching us yesterday.

“Did you guys see Clay this morning before he went for his run?” I ask, taking a sip of my store bought nitro cold brew that Clay restocked for me. If he could put a nitro tap in his house, I’d truly be in heaven.

Tanner and V shake their heads before TJ chuckles at the end of the table. He looks down smiling at his coffee, like he knows somethingwe don’t. “He was up even earlier today. I swear I never thought I’d meet someone who’s more of a morning person than me.”

Grace scoffs at him. “Yeah. What time do I need to get up so I can get a cold plunge in before you’re out there fishing?”

TJ rolls his eyes. “I just want to fish in the morning without having someone scare all the fish away.”

I hold my coffee to my lips, instantly intrigued by this exchange.

Grace glares back at him, flicking her hair over her shoulder in a wave of bright colors. “Did I scare the fish or are you just saying that because I nearly made you jump out of your waders?”

“Whatever, Rainbow,” TJ groans before taking his plate to the sink. “I’ll see you guys around later. Have fun out at the mountain.”

Tanner and Vlead the way back to the lodge for lunch. A late season storm rolled in last night and brought more snow this morning, so we had an unexpectedly nice powder day.

In Aspen Valley they go out of their way to groom as many runs as possible. It seems like the locals here in Oregon really like untouched powder though. It’s only been half a day of skiing and my quads areburning. I make a mental note to tell my accountability buddy, and now boyfriend, that he’s going to have to step up my workouts. We definitely need to hit quads more.

Wait.Boyfriend? Is that what he is now?

I think about that the whole way down the mountain, catching up with V, Tanner, and Grace who already have their skis in the racks outside the lodge. I ski up next to them and I click out of my own skis. I rest my goggles on top of my helmet when I hear Grace shout something at Tanner.

“Hey. Is that…” Her voice trails off and I look up to see her pointing up the slope, both of them watching something. V joins them and I follow their gaze until my eyes spot it.

There’s one skier, clad in black gear, effortlessly, methodically, beautifully working their way down the ski run towards where we’re standing. He makes his way down and hits the shallow run out of the slope, skiing up to the others and clicking out of his skis. The only thing visible from under his gear, helmet, and goggles is his proud, square jaw.

But from where he is, I recognize that figure, that posture, that presence.

No.

There’s no way.

Tanner and Grace stand there in disbelief as he brushes past them and strides right to me. I look up, noticing the mirrored goggles, tinted a brilliant green, one that I know matches the eyes underneath them that are boring into me.

I stand there in disbelief, my jaw hanging open, watching until he’s standing inches from me. My arms hang down at my side helplessly and I’m pretty sure I look like a deer caught in headlights.

He takes off his helmet and goggles, throwing them to the ground and looks right down at me.

It’s him. I still can’t believe it.

He looks at me in such an intense, longing way that makes my heart flutter. He reaches down to tuck one of my slut strands out of my face, his finger grazing my exposed skin, which sends a spark through me.

His voice is low and gravelly when he leans down for just me to hear. “Is now the right time?”

CHAPTER 35

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