Page 89 of Fall Apart

“That’s it? Nothing else to say? When did you even get here?”

He finally stops typing and looks up, taking his glasses off.

His eyes search my face, seeing my smeared makeup and my puffy red eyes. “I got here a couple days ago. I told you I was coming to town to check on a new investment, a company we just became the majority owner of. Is everything alright?”

My rage boils over. “You’ve been here for days and you haven’t even called me or messaged me? You haven’t even noticed that I haven’t been here at the condo and I’ve been staying at my boyfriend’s house the whole time?”

I look into his eyes again and think about what Clay asked. Have I ever told him how he makes me feel?

“And no, everything isn’t alright. My boyfriend is - I don't know - it’s complicated. And then there’syou.” His eyes are softer now, fixed on me. “Why do you always make me feel like I’m not good enough for you? Why does it feel like I’m an afterthought all the time?”

I take a long sip from my glass, sitting down at the island next to him, and bury my face into my palms as the tears fall.

A moment passes before I feel him wrap his arm around me, his hand rubbing my shoulder. His voice is almost like wind in the treetops, distant and faint. “I’m sorry, honey. I’m so sorry I ever made you feel that way. Tell me how I can help.”

I drop my head to his shoulder, not remembering the last time I ever felt close or safe like this with him.

“Just be my dad, please. Talk to me, remember my birthday, find time for me.” I look up at him and I see the second set of broken eyes in a man today. “Show me that you love me.”

He lifts his hand, wiping away a stray tear before it reaches his cheek.

“I’ll try, Lizzy. You grew up so damn fast. You became so independent and so strong. It felt like overnight you became this fierce woman that didn’t need her dad anymore.” He chokes back another tear. “Charlotte was never like that. Then when she got sick and was in and out of the hospital, she needed us so much.”

“I needed you too, Dad.” I feel my lips quiver, remembering what it was like for all of us then. I know she was sick, but I still felt so cast aside.

“I know, sweetie, I know. It was so easy to take it for granted because you were so brave. I’ll always be sorry for that, but that doesn’t mean I ever stopped loving you. I always wanted the best for you. Schools, family trips, internships, everything. Somewhere along the way I just didn’t know how to talk to you anymore. But I love you, exactly the way you are.”

I drop my head back to his shoulder, suddenly glad that he’s here and that I’m not alone tonight. “Ok, Dad. I love you, too.”

He hums against my head, holding me tightly. “Now tell me about this boyfriend.”

This time I’m the one that rubs a tear from my eye. “I don’t know. Like I said, it’s complicated. But he’s special. He makes me feel special like no one else ever has.”

He hums softly in thought. “And do you love him?”

I groan and say it out loud for the second time today. “Yes. Yes, I do.”

“Then I’d love to learn more about him and meet him. If anyone can work their way into your heart, they have to be something special.”

I laugh between my slowing tears. “Yeah, he’s something else.”

Minutes pass and I just enjoy the unexpected but welcome closeness of my dad. Today’s been a rollercoaster and this was definitely not how I expected it to end.

“What about you? What company did you buy now?”

A laugh rumbles from his chest behind me. “You really want to talk about my business? You never showed interest before when I offered to hire you.”

“Well, if I expect you to try harder, so should I.”

He lets out another short laugh. “Alright. We bought a local real estate developer. We’ve wanted to grow our footprint out West, especially with resort and leisure travel in ski towns. Their founder was looking to take a step back and it seemed like a good company. And he’s a local icon, which should help with marketing. They’re profitable, but could be doing better. I'm sure we’ll make something out of them.”

I nod, my tears and sniffling finally ending. “Sounds like a good fit.”

He hums in agreement. “I’m actually going to their annual banquet tomorrow. The Golden Jensen Family night at the Grand Lodge’s event hall.”

Golden Jensen Family. My head jerks up. “Say that again.”

I look at him and he shrugs. “Golden Jensen Family. What about it?”

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