Page 54 of The Last to Know

Alex smiled up at her, the music changing into something gentler. “I realised that there was nobody on this Earth who got me like she did, and who allowed me to get her.”

Grace considered it, her own thoughts moving to Caz and how she made her feel. “I can understand that.”

“Do you love her?” Alex asked, still playing, but her eyes watched Grace’s face.

Staring out of the window, Grace smiled at Caz talking animatedly with Morgan. She turned back to Alex. “Yes, she’s my person.”

“I think that’s obvious to anyone who meets you both.” Alex grinned. “But you’re not attracted to her?”

“I’m straight. So, yeah, kind of an issue…”

“That’s not what I asked.” Alex smirked playfully. “I’ve slept with many straight women.”

Feeling her face flush, Grace bit her lip. “I just…sometimes I look at her and I wonder if we could…but then I think about the mechanics of it all and I’m not sure that’s something that does it for me.”

“You know it’s not all scissoring and sitting on a face, right?” Alex laughed gently. “Sex is sex, Grace. How you do it and what gets you off are personal choices.”

Grace nodded. “We kissed…”

“She said.”

“Then she said we shouldn’t do that anymore, but then she kissed me again this afternoon. I like that. I like cuddling and kissing her.”

“But?” Alex stopped playing.

“We got into this with an arrangement, and things have changed a little between us, but…I don’t want to risk losing what we do have by experimenting with something I’m not sure I can—I don’t want to let her think it might and then it doesn’t happen, and it ruins what we have. I can live without sex. I don’t think I can live without her.”

Now it was Alex who nodded. “Well, she already put a ring on it, so I guess you have all the time in the world to figure it out.”

Grace laughed. “Yes, maybe…I just hope it’s enough for her.”

Alex looked out through the door, towards the decking where she could see Caz. “She looks at you like you’re enough.”

“She does,” Grace admitted.

Chapter Thirty-Three

They’d barely been home for a few hours when Grace announced she had an appointment for the clinic later that week.

“It just seems prudent to get the process started, don’t you think?” she said, as Caz pushed clothing into the washing machine.

“I guess.”

“You don’t sound too excited.”

Caz stood up and twisted around to lean against the worktop. “I’m just trying to stay grounded, you know, in case—”

“In case it doesn’t work and I’m a complete wreck?” Grace stepped forward, moving slowly until she was stood right in front of Caz. Her arms snaked around her wife’s waist, and she sighed contentedly when Caz reciprocated.

“I just want to be ready for all outcomes,” Caz answered, kissing the top of Grace’s head, taking comfort from the familiar scent of her shampoo.

“We can wait, if that makes it easier, I don’t mind—”

“No,” Caz said firmly. She took hold of Grace’s shoulders and stared down at her. “This is what we want, right? It’s the reason we did this.”

“Yeah, but it needs to be the right time, and I feel like I’m rushing you.”

Caz shook her head. “We don’t have time, that’s the point, isn’t it? Ageing eggs!” She smiled ruefully. “You’re right, we need to move forward and do this.”

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