Page 125 of Voices

“Why the fuck are you talking in third person? She’s been to most of our games. She knows what number you are.” Shane backhands his shoulder, laughing.

Ryder’s cheeks turn pink before he chuckles, spins around, and walks out of the room.

Lily starts laughing so hard that she shakes the bed.

“That…was…hilarious!” She says between laughing.

I scoot further under the blankets and close my eyes, not seeing what was so funny and just wanting everyone to go away.

“Okay then,” I hear Shane say. “On that note, Lily you know where the meds and ice packs are. We have leftovers in the fridge. Feel free to eat whatever.” He pauses then I sense him standing next to the bed. “Get some rest baby. I’ll be home as soon as I can.” He runs his fingers through my hair and then places a lingering kiss on my forehead.

I hear him walk to the door but he must stop because I feel Lily climb off the bed a second later. They say something in hushed voices before the door closes. Lily climbs back on the bed and snuggles me over the blanket.

I keep my eye closed as I listen to her talk about how Noah keeps doing stupid shit to get her attention and how she doesn’t want to lose him as a friend when she eventually tells him no. She goes on and on for almost an hour without me uttering one word.

I ask for a pain pill when my headache becomes too much from her talking. When she comes back from getting it, she cracks open a window and pulls out a joint and lighter from her purse.

She waves the joint at me. “If you want this, you gotta get up and come over here. It’ll be easier to get rid of the smell if it’s going right out the window.”

I slowly move into a sitting position, and after what feels like forever, I make it to the window and collapse on the edge of Shane’s desk. I shiver at the wind blowing in from the window. Lily places the joint in her mouth and sucks a few times to get the paper burned off the end.

She hands me the pill and a bottle of water. I quickly swallow it down and reach for the joint from her lips. Taking as much smoke into my lungs as my ribs will allow, I close my eye and hold it in, letting it out when the pain in my ribs becomes too much. We smoke in silence until it’s gone. I watch her flick the roach out of the window before closing it.

I can already feel it making my movements even more sluggish as I climb into bed. I pull the hood up on Shane’s hoodie and tuck in under the warm blankets. Lily turns up the TV as the guys line up for the beginning of the game. I watch until the first intermission then let my heavy eyes fall shut.

Shane climbing in bed behind me wakes me.

“Hey, beautiful. How are you feeling?” He kisses my shoulder.

I’m too tired to answer so I close my eye again and stay on my side facing away from him. He pulls me back until the warmth of his chest seeps into my back through the hoodie. He wedges a leg through mine and settles his hand over my heart.

I should feel happy and content right now but I’m just…numb.

Maybe if I just let go, I would be set free from this life.

Chapter Thirty-Two

Shane

Something is going on with Charlie.

He didn’t say anything last night when I got home and didn’t want to eat dinner. When I asked if he was hurting, he let out a soft whimper but didn’t say anything. And then when I went back into my room after eating dinner with the guys, he was in the same spot.

It's now one pm the next day, and he’s still in bed. He’s awake, his good eye open but unseeing as he stares in front of him. I tried to get him to sit up and drink some water but he either didn’t hear me or ignored me. I even made his favorite sugar-overloaded cookies with M&Ms and chocolate chips in hopes it’ll get him to eat. But he only took two bites before he turned his face into the pillow.

Ryder and Matt sat on the floor in front of him earlier and tried to get him to laugh while they argued over who played better yesterday. Their bickering usually has the corner of his mouth tilting up in a half grin but this time he closed his eye and kept it closed.

Kneeling next to my bed now, I smooth his hair off his face.

“Charlie, are you hungry?” I tilt my head to look into his left eye.

He blinks slowly but continues to stare at nothing, eyes glossing over.

I blow out a slow breath. “Let me know when you need something,” I whisper against his forehead. “Anything. Okay? I’m right here for you.”

When I look back down at him, his eye is closed.

I lay my head on my bent arm that’s on the edge of the bed and watch as his breathing slows even more, and he falls asleep.

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