Page 15 of Voices

I try to get up, but the Ambien has started kicking in, and I'm sluggish as hell. My arms start to get heavy, and I'm struggling to keep my eyes open. Fuck it. I'll deal with this shit tomorrow. Dropping the sketchbook on my end table, I turn over and throw the blankets over my head. Between the weed and meds, I'll hopefully get enough sleep to wake up forgetting today even happened.

I wake sometime later to someone rubbing my forehead softly.

“Go away,” I grumble.

I hear someone snicker from further away, then a tug on my hair.

“Nope. It’s late, and I want to go home, so your ass needs to show me that you’re ok,” comes Lily’s soft voice.

I slowly open one eye and slam it closed again. “Turn the fucking light off. It’s too damn bright.”

She turns my lamp off as I hear the switch by the door, which means Noah is here, too.

I cautiously open my eyes and relax when the only light is from the soft glow of the kitchen light coming through my door.

“What? I’m fine,” I croak when I see their glares. My throat is dry as hell. How long did I sleep?

“Dude, you’ve been passed out and have hardly moved an inch since we got here at five,” Noah says, folding his arms over his chest.

I look at the clock and see it’s almost one in the morning. I have no clue what time I fell asleep. I know it was around twelve thirty when I went to the café, and I remember seeing two sixteen on my phone when I grabbed it to look up the hockey player.

Shit, I slept for almost ten hours. That’s the most I’ve gotten in a while.

I push the blankets down as I sit up and scoot back so I’m leaning against the headboard. “Well, I’m fine and now I’m awake. Anything else?”

They look at each other and then back at me. Noah rolls my chair from my desk over and sits down with a serious look on his face. “What’s going on, dude? We know you don’t like loud places, but running out at lunch like your ass was on fire was a bit much.”

Lily reaches for my hand, looking me in the eye. “Please talk to us, Jax. I know something is up besides the sketchbook thing.” She took to calling me Jax after she found out about my crush on Charlie Hunnam.

With my hand still in hers, I watch as she spots the new burn mark. She gives me a knowing look. We’ve known each other since freshman year in high school, so she knows how I got them. But not why.

Letting out a deep breath, I give her a tight-lipped smile, refusing to say anything.

“So, that’s it then?” Noah grunts.

I turn my head to him and nod with the same tight smile.

He lets out a short puff of air through his nose and stands up. “Alright Lil, he clearly doesn’t want to talk. I need to get some sleep before my eight AM class.”

Lily stands and trails after him. When she gets to the door, she turns back to me with a sad smile. “You need to put someNeosporin on that so it doesn’t get infected.” I nod, waiting for her to leave.

“We’ll talk later when you’re more awake and he’s in class.” She tilts her head towards the door.

“Sure,” I say quietly.

She leaves my room, and I wait until I hear the front door close. Letting out a slow breath, I sink back down so I’m back under my blankets.

Sometimes, I wish she would forget about me. I wouldn’t be a burden that she’s always worried about, and she could hang out with her better friends who always make her smile. Why she keeps hanging out with me is confusing.

I try to go back to sleep but my bladder is cramping. I begrudgingly get out of bed and head to the bathroom. After I piss, I head to the small kitchen for some water and food.

I find my last bottle of water in my now empty fridge. I chug it as I look in the cabinets for something to eat. All I find is an opened box of stale Froot Loops, a half-eaten bag of cheddar Sun Chips, and an unopened jar of crunchy peanut butter. Grabbing the bag of chips, I head to my art room.

I live in an on-campus townhouse by myself. I was able to get one without a roommate thanks to the partial trust fund money I got after I graduated high school. My account took a decent hit, but if there was one thing I couldn’t deal with, it was sharing my space.

I converted the other bedroom into my art room. I shoved the bed into the closet, and put the desk and end table into the living room so I could have as much space as possible to work.

I flip on the light and connect my phone to the Bluetooth speaker, turning on my rock mix.Sound of Madnessby Shinedown comes on.

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