Page 177 of Voices

“It’s perfectly normal to be nervous about going to new places, Charlie. Just remember your exercises when it starts to feel like it’s becoming too much.” She tilts her head. “How have the nightmares and flashbacks been? You seem a lot calmer than the last meeting.”

“I haven’t had any recently. I found talking it out with Shane anytime a memory is triggered has helped a lot.”

“It’s good to hear that you’re willing to let him know when you need the extra support.”

I smirk. “He’s the best.”

“And the urges to cut or seek out drugs? How has that been going?

Even though talking everything out with Jennifer and Shane has been helping a lot, I still have days when the voices come back, and talking just isn’t enough.

“It’s been hard on the bad days to not reach for a razor or call my old supplier. But I’ve found that starting a new art project quiets the voices and keeps them away once I really get into what I’m doing.”

She smiles softly. “It’s good that you recognized the negative thoughts and redirected them with something calming. I’m happy that you have your art not only to express yourself but also to help in your recovery.” She looks at her watch. “Our time is up for today.”

We stand at the same time, meeting at her door.

“Tell Shane I said good luck.” She opens the door for me. “I’ll see you next week Charlie.”

I wave by and head outside to my car.

I’ve been driving it more since my father is currently behind bars and my mother is nowhere to be found.

After Lily filled me in on what happened in the garage, I haven’t seen Benji except at games. He's still on the team because there was no way to prove he was a part of my father’s plan against me. But Matt came over after practice with busted knuckles and wouldn’t tell me what happened. He and Ryder just said Benji won’t be coming anywhere near me again.

Someone else who won’t be coming near me anymore is Conrad.

He was caught a week after I was released from the hospital trying to smuggle himself across the border. He refused to get out of the car and then pulled out a gun and tried to threaten his way into Mexico.

Needless to say, he was swiftly removed from the car and taken down.

He’s on trial for raping me along with four other young men and is facing fifty years in prison.

It feels like the heaviest weight has been lifted from my body, along with the constant voices tearing me down.

The weather is the warmest it’s been in weeks, so I roll down my windows and blastDown with the Sicknessby Disturbed as I drive home.

Walking into the condo, it’s eerily quiet. Ryder almost always has the TV on with either a movie or video game, and Shane said the guys were meeting here for lunch when I got back. There’s a mess of food on the counter but it looks like he stopped halfway through.

“Shane?”

I walk further into the condo and stop when I see all four of them hovering around the coffee table. As I get closer to Shane, I hear someone talking but it’s none of them.

“What’s-”

Ryder holds up his hand without taking his eyes off the table.

I look over Shane’s shoulder and see his phone on the table with a call on speaker.

“On behalf of the Tampa Bay Thunder, I’d like to invite you to come play a scrimmage game with the team. Coach has had his eye on you for a while and can’t wait to see you play with the guys. And as the top prospect for Defensemen, I’m sure you’ve received this call from other teams as well. We’re hopeful you’ll find your time with the team is exactly what you’re looking for and that we’ll see you come to the start of next season.”

I have no idea who this guy is, but it has all of them frozen.

“Shane? Are you there?”

“Y-Yes. I’m here, sorry,” he clears his throat. “I’d love to go down there and play with the team.”

“Wonderful! I’ll set everything up and send you an email with the details.”

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