Page 96 of Voices

I slap her hands with a huff. “Stop. I’m not telling you anything that involves what’s below my boyfriend’s waist.”

She laughs as Noah walks into my room. He stops when he sees us, looking from Lily to me and back.

“I have the food,” he grumbles before turning around and walking away.

“What’s up with him?” I ask as I slowly climb from my bed.

She shrugs and wraps her arm around my waist. “Don’t know. He was fine earlier. He probably struck out with one of the bimbos on the cheer squad,” she chuckles as we make our way to where he’s sitting in the living room.

I take my spot in the corner and curl up with a few blankets as they sort through the food. Lily hands me a warm quesadilla and a small tray of nachos. I pick at the corner of the quesadilla where the cheese melted out as Noah turns on the TV and searches for something to watch, landing on The Hunger Games.

I pull out my phone and stare down at the text Shane sent a little while ago.

Blue: Good morning beautiful. I won’t be able to make it to your place for lunch. I have a meeting with Coach Q then strength training right after. But I ran into Lily and she said she’ll come over after her last class. I’ll wait for you after your evening class and walk you home for dinner :) See you later baby

I stare at my phone until the screen goes black.

He’s too good for you.

You’ve done nothing but cause him stress.

You’re going to cost him his spot on an NHL team!

I scrub a hand over my face as I put my phone back in my pocket.

“Aren’t you going to eat?” Lily asks as she pops a chip covered in cheese into her mouth.

I look at her as I take a big bite of the quesadilla and smile. She lifts a brow at me as I hand her the nachos back. “I don’t like the cheese sauce,” I say as I finish chewing. Rolling her eyes, she takes it and hands it to Noah who has two empty takeaway containers on his lap and doesn’t hesitate to finish off the nachos.

Lily shifts, and I see concern in her bright cerulean eyes. I hate seeing that look so I look down and take another small bite of the quesadilla. She lets out a puff of air and stands.

I peek up and watch her walk into the bathroom and close the door behind her. I close my eyes and tilt my head back, resting it on the cushion.

I just want to be alone.

Noah moves around on the opposite side of the couch and then kicks my leg. I turn my head to look at him, keeping the back of my head on the cushion.

“What the fuck dude? I’ve had to listen to her worry about you since Shane asked her to come over this morning. We were supposed to hang out after class but instead, we’re sitting here, watching you wallow in self-pity or some shit.” He shakes his head at me. “I don’t want to see her freak out over you anymore, especially over something as simple as getting out of bed.” He looks over at the closed bathroom door and then back at me. He leans over and drops his voice to a whisper. “I know only we’re friends because of Lily but I’m trying to get with her and you being all,” he waves a hand up and down toward me, “is fucking everything up. Snap out of it, dude! Take some pills to make you not so fucking depressing to be around and get back to your life. Lily has shit to do for her classes and instead of concentrating on it, she’s here, taking care of your miserable ass.”

Glancing over his shoulder again, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a clear bag filled with smaller baggies. He fishes out a joint, puts it in his mouth, lights it, and hands it to me.

The pungent skunky smell curls around me as I take a hit. I close my eyes and hold it in my lungs for as long as I can. When I can’t hold it in any longer, I slowly release the smoke, enjoying the fuzzy feeling.

“Here. This will help too.”

I open one eye and see him holding out a small green…piece of candy? I take it from him and bring it up to my face, trying to figure out what it is. It looks like a big Smartie with a smiley face on it.

He tucks the rest away before nodding to my hand. “Molly. Take that when you’re ready to get shit done. You’ll be energized and in a significantly better mood.”

I take another pull from the joint as I imagine what it’ll feel like to not feel like this. I bet it’ll shut the voices up and I’ll be able to do more than lay around.

Maybehewill disappear from my mind.

I nod as the bathroom door opens. I quickly stuff the pill in my pocket as Lily steps into the room. She scrunches her nose at the smell as she sits back down between me and Noah.

“That shit stinks,” she waves a hand in front of her to clear the smoke. She faces me looking…nervous? I lift a brow, waiting. She looks over her shoulder at Noah and then back to me. “I found your antidepressants and I think you should start taking them again.” She holds out a pill bottle. “I’ll still ask my friends about alternate ways to help but you need to start taking these.”

I stare at the bottle in her hands as I take another hit.

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