Chapter 16
Faith
“Wait…hold on…back up…rewind,” Rose says, with her hands up. “You’re leaving? With Falcon?”
“Just for a few weeks, but yes.” I turn to face her. “I know it’s crazy. It doesn’t even make any sense. Why would I even consider…”
She stops me with her hand covering my mouth. “Don’t. Stop right there.”
I just widen my eyes in response and place my hands on my hips.
Rose has always been my most honest friend. She scoops me up when I need her. She gives tough love when it’s necessary. If I’m being dumb or over the top or too sensitive, she tells me to buck up and stop wallowing. I know I can count on her to tell me the truth. If this is a crazy decision, she will tell me that, and I will take a step back and really think about this.
Even though, deep down, I know I want to go more than anything, and I’m not sure any amount of logic will stop me at this point.
“Don’t do exactly what I know you’re about to do. You don’t need to defend yourself or your choices. You don’t need to explain your choices to anyone at all. You are doing what you want for the first time in so long. How many times have I told you that you need to live a little?”
My body sags in relief. I didn’t even realize I was tense until this moment. I don’t need Rose’s approval or permission, obviously, but knowing that I have at least one person in my corner, telling me this is okay, means everything to me.
She moves her hand from my mouth and takes both of my shoulders in them.
“Too many times to count,” I admit.
“So go live. You need to explore. Have fun. Have sex. Be crazy. Be spontaneous and risky. Follow the hot fighter for a little bit, get a few killer orgasms out of it, then come back home refreshed and ready to take on the world.”
“It’ll be more than a few.” I smirk. “But Rose, is this stupid? I mean...should this be something I even do?”
“Goddamn right. That’s my girl,” she says, completely ignoring my question at first. “And what did I just say? Stop questioning yourself. If you feel in your heart you want to go have some fun, do it! But, while my job as your best friend is to gas you up and tell you what a badass you’re being, the other side of my brain wants to make sure you’re not leaving me for good. You are coming home…right? I don’t have to say my goodbyes or anything right now?”
I frown a bit and pull her into a tight hug. “I’ll be home. This is just a fun, long vacation.”
“Then do what feels right and good in your heart and your body. Promise? You’ve earned this and you, of all people, deserve this. I’m really proud of you, Faith. You could have allowed your past to destroy you, but you came out on the other side. That’s huge.”
I try not to cry, I really do, but the hot tears seep down my cheeks before I can even stop them. Not because I’m leaving, because I know I’ll be back, but because of her words. I’ve needed to hear them for so long. I’ve needed to know from someone, other than my mom, I was okay and I had finally made it.
“I love you, Rose.” I wrap her up in a hug and squeeze tight.
“I love you too.” She pulls away just a bit before she claps her hands together. “All right. Let’s back you some surprises that will knock that filthy fighter’s socks off.”
Falcon
“This is my least favorite part,” my sister says, as she sits on the edge of the bed, holding my hoodie in her hands. “Do you really have to go?”
“You know I do, Nor, and don’t act like I’m enjoying this part any more than you are. I miss you every day.”
“Then stop fighting and move here,” she says matter-of-factly, as if it’s just that simple.
“I really don’t want to argue about this every single time we speak. You know I want to finish out my scheduled fights. Let me do that and then we can talk about the rest.”
“Why can’t we talk about it now? Faith is here. Doesn’t that change anything?”
“What do you mean?” I stop what I’m doing and look her way.
“Don’t play dumb with me. It’s obvious you two like each other a lot. Dinner last night made that crystal clear, so trying to be coy like we didn’t all see it was a useless effort.” She tips her head to the side and waits for my response.
“I do like her. She’s fun and…” I pause as I try to find the right words to describe her, and honestly, nothing I can come up with does her justice, so I go with something simple, “absolutely fucking amazing.”
“If she’s so fucking amazing. Stay here.”