Page 20 of Taurus

“Pleeeeeease.”

I sigh heavily and grab the ingredients from the fridge. “You’re lucky I’m hungry too.”

“Yesssss,” I hear him say behind me and I smile knowing he can’t see me. “To say thank you, I’ll finish making your tea.”

“I suppose I’m okay with that.”

We work side by side, in relative silence. Me, toasting the bread and spreading on the mayo and garlic aoli and stacking the ham and other veggies while he pours the boiling water over my tea bag in a mug, adding honey and a bit of lemon.

“You remembered how I drink tea?” I ask him as I slice his sandwich in half.

“Honestly, Park, there’s very little I don’t remember about you. You were so engraved in my brain and my body for so long that I’d have to work very hard to forget, and even then, I probably couldn’t.”

The metallic clink of the spoon as he stirs the tea fills the silence as I try to process what he’s said.

“It’s hard to forget things that consumed you, I suppose.”

“And if we did nothing else during our time together, it was consume one another,” he adds and slides the mug across the counter to me. “All yours.”

“Thanks.” I keep my focus on the plate, slicing my own sandwich in half. “That one is yours.” I point to the plate next to mine with the knife in my hand. “Dig in.”

“Eat in the dining room with me?” he asks and I look up at him. He looks so much like the boy I knew right now. It’s impossible to say no to him like that.

“Sure.” I nod then give him a soft smile.

“Great.” He lifts his plate into his hand and takes my mug of tea in the other. “I’ll take this for you.”

When he’s left the kitchen, I place both hands on the countertop and lower my head, letting all of the thoughts and feelings whip around in my brain in this moment of privacy.

I know, without a doubt, there are buried feelings deep in my heart for Austin. How couldn’t there be? So much of my life, in my formative years, was wrapped up in him, and they say you can’t really stop loving the first person you ever fall for.

I spent the last decade trying to convince myself I hated this man because of what he did to me. I talked shit about him to my friends in D.C., and made him out to be this horrific villain who took advantage of my heart, only to betray me and shatter it into a million pieces so badly I could never go back to Georgia ever again. I even believed that myself for awhile, but I know he’s not a monster. He just made a mistake, but that mistake is enough to keep the wall around my heart pretty sturdy for now.

When I finally join him at the dining room table, he has his phone face up in the middle of the table, Spotify open, and a soft, indie folk sounding song croons from the small speaker.

“I like that. Who is it?” I ask him, sitting in the chair directly across from him.

“The National.”

“Ohhh, yes, I’ve heard them before. They have a song with Taylor Swift. Hold on.” I reach across and take his phone, without asking, like it’s the most normal, casual thing in the world, and find “Coney Island” by Taylor Swift featuring The National and press play. It’s only when I lay his phone back down that I realize what I did. “Shit, I’m sorry. I should have asked. That was rude.”

“No, it’s okay. I don’t mind. Reminds me of old times, honestly.” He lifts the sandwich and takes a bite. “Mmm, and so does this.”

We sit in relative silence for a moment, letting the lyrics of the song wash over us. It’s about a broken relationship that has passed its prime and both parties being heartbroken things didn’t work out. The similarities to our history actually make my chest hurt. I guess I didn’t consider it when I pressed play.

“God, this song is sad,” I say, shaking my head.

“It is, but it’s beautiful nonetheless.”

I blow on my tea to cool it just a little before taking a sip, and it’s perfect, of course. I place it back on the table and trace my fingertip around the porcelain rim. I bring one leg up to my chest, sitting with that foot flat on the chair under me.

“Can I say something?” I ask and he nods, taking a sip from a bottle of water. “I could hear you outside with Carrie the entire time she was here. My window was right there, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t ignore it.”

“You were spying on us?” he asks with a smirk.

“Hardly. You just happened to take your date to the one place on the property that has a direct line to my damn bedroom here. You know I can hear everything in there.”

“Did you hear anything interesting?”

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